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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Why do we get angry at things people say?

for example someone says:

"wow, you're SO short/tall"
"you're so shy/quiet"


I don't know why i get mad when people say i'm so short... i already know i'm short.. so why do i get mad? how can i make my brain stop getting mad at this?.. i'm 5'2.. the average women is 5'3-5'4 so i'm not that far behind!

....maybe i should get mad.. cuz why would anyone make comments like this unless theyre totally retarded? ..lol SEE i'm getting mad heheheh...


i don't even know how to reply when people say these 2 comments... why do i say? ... for some time when people used to say "wow, you're so short" i would be like" wow, thank you" and the person would laugh... and i'd be like what?you said it as a compliment right, otherwise you wouldn't be laughing and then i get mad anyway lol...

what you guys think i should say when people make these comments?
and how should i train my brain to not get mad at these comments


~thank you~
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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Re: Why do we get angry at things people say?

Think of it as people just making random small talk when they don't really know what else to say.

Sometimes I see someone and my first thought is, WOW that person is tall! It's not so much a compliment or not a compliment... it just is what it is.
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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Re: Why do we get angry at things people say?

It depends, some people may just want to start a conversation while others might just make a comment because they want to see a reaction. If someone says "Wow you're short/quiet" I would just acknowledge it, "yeah, I know". Again, it depends on their tone and whether it's being said in a friendly/joking way or not. If they're nasty, then maybe throw some sarcasm at them. Otherwise I'd say just be polite and acknowledge it. Wearing your emotions on your sleeve can make you an easy target.
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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Re: Why do we get angry at things people say?

I hate when people tell me I'm short too. EVERYONE in my family is tall. Actually being short makes me mad, and I get mad at people for reminding me
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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Re: Why do we get angry at things people say?

hehe im 5'2 as well, but i love being short! We are unique people hehe. i get angry at many compliments, possibly because since people dont communicate with me that often, that when they do it seems like they are trying to be sh*tty to me since they never acknowledge my presence in the first place.
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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Re: Why do we get angry at things people say?

I don't mean this in a condescending way, but I've always found shortness a very appealing/cute feature on a person.

If you don't like people pointing out the obvious, you could just simply reply; ''I know.''. It's not like you've deliberately choose to be short/quiet that day, pointing it out is unnecessary. For example, comments like ''I like/don't like that shirt'' is something you can work with, ''You're short/quiet'' is not. It's pretty easy to understand that the quiet/short person knows it about him/herself, no need to point out something obvious and unchangeable unless it's a compliment. Of course, the quiet thing can be changed in this case, but is still not something worth mentioning.

Don't get too wrapped up into it. If it's an insult then it's a cheap one at that, and so it's wasted energy to get mad about. Cheap insults get cheap replies. When it's a compliment, accept it. :3

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Last edited by BlackPuma; 05-04-2011 at 06:23 AM..
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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Re: Why do we get angry at things people say?

Because we tend to be overly sensitive to criticism, even if it's constructive.
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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Re: Why do we get angry at things people say?

You need to make humor of the situation. When someone says "You're so short", you say something like "all the better to hide from the boss". It isn't really the reply that's important, rather it's making light of the situation in your own mind. If you reply with a comment that obviously isn't serious then your brain associates the original comment with something light hearted. Don't make the mistake of over analyzing the situation afterwards though, because then it could get tricky.
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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Re: Why do we get angry at things people say?

Well, I'm tall but I've always dated short women (never one over 5'4'') because that's my personal preference. So while it is something you just have to accept and learn to live with, it's also something to celebrate because it's a feature unique to you that is also going to be considered attractive by a lot of people. Enjoy the fact that being petite makes you naturally feminine, and recognize that you can always do things to boost your height but that taller women can't get any shorter if they want to.
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Old 05-04-2011  
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Default Re: Why do we get angry at things people say?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kinetik View Post
Well, I'm tall but I've always dated short women (never one over 5'4'') because that's my personal preference. So while it is something you just have to accept and learn to live with, it's also something to celebrate because it's a feature unique to you that is also going to be considered attractive by a lot of people. Enjoy the fact that being petite makes you naturally feminine, and recognize that you can always do things to boost your height but that taller women can't get any shorter if they want to.
That's pretty much what I wanted to say , lol
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