Wierd Phobia- am i the only one?

sareybarey919 · 09-27-2005

I have this crazy thing where the collar part of my shirt absolutely CANNOT touch my neck or i will freak out. So constantly throughout the day i have to hold my shirt away from my neck, so its like i am living my life with one hand. I can take it away for a while if im not really thinking but the second i remember it like completely freaks me out and i cant go on without pulling it away. Its hard for me because i hide this from my parents because when they used to know about it they sent me straight to therapy, which totally made it worse because then i felt like i was crazy or something, so i bought a bunch of polos that didnt bother the part of the neck that "cant be touched" (its like that little indention between your collar bones where you can push it in) and i "got over it" which got me out of therapy and put my parents under the impression that i was all better. So for the last year everything has worked out fine because i just do it at school and stuff when they arent around, but now that i am starting to drive and my mom makes me drive with two hands it makes me crazy because i feel it then like worse than ever so i am completley having like these mini panic attacks behind the wheel, which is most likely pretty dangerous. I am desperate and have dealt with this problem for at least 4 years so please if you know anything help me out.

dream_j · 10-25-2005

Quote:

Originally Posted by sareybarey919

I have this crazy thing where the collar part of my shirt absolutely CANNOT touch my neck or i will freak out. So constantly throughout the day i have to hold my shirt away from my neck, so its like i am living my life with one hand. I can take it away for a while if im not really thinking but the second i remember it like completely freaks me out and i cant go on without pulling it away. Its hard for me because i hide this from my parents because when they used to know about it they sent me straight to therapy, which totally made it worse because then i felt like i was crazy or something, so i bought a bunch of polos that didnt bother the part of the neck that "cant be touched" (its like that little indention between your collar bones where you can push it in) and i "got over it" which got me out of therapy and put my parents under the impression that i was all better. So for the last year everything has worked out fine because i just do it at school and stuff when they arent around, but now that i am starting to drive and my mom makes me drive with two hands it makes me crazy because i feel it then like worse than ever so i am completley having like these mini panic attacks behind the wheel, which is most likely pretty dangerous. I am desperate and have dealt with this problem for at least 4 years so please if you know anything help me out.

Get over it...learn to like you shirt touching your neck.
Love Dat COTTON!

Tom_Measor · 10-26-2005

You can create a phobia from just about anything sareybarey919. What you need to do is to desensitise yourself from the association between your collar and anxiety.
With all phobias, you condition yourself to react to a certain event, or situation. So what you need to do is to gradually replace the feeling of anxiety you experience with your collar touching your neck, with one of calmness and a state of relaxation. To do this, you first need to learn how to deeply relax at will - which will takes time to learn, then you can start to neutralise your phobia.

Tom

dimitra · 10-30-2005

re:sara...

You have described a tactlie aversion which is common amongst people with other disorders. It sounds as if it is the material which has the fear effect on you. Can you talk to someone else about it ither than your parents who don't seem to understand. This lack of understanding reagrding family members is also common. I used to suffer from agoraphobia and despite the love of my family they had not comprehension of what I was experiencing and therefore were not the best supporters.

Shattered · 01-29-2006

You are NOT the only one with a weird phobia. I have many. Probably the one I get the most crap over is my phobia of gas pumps.. yeah.. There are only two I've been able to cope with using ever..

Luckily I don't drive (or go out) anymore so I don't have to deal with them. And since I'm moving to the ever-so-pedestrian-friendly UK it's not something I HAVE to worry about ever again!

ishq · 01-29-2006

in response to yetisbabe's statement that she cannot stand eyes lookin at her....
what exactly do u feel then because i have somewhat a similar problem.....
also.1 more thing......... we all discuss our problems here n tell 1 another that it is ok.....u r not alone...im sure that helps..... but howmuch???
thtas the question....cant somethin be done that we become perfectly healthy human beings and so that we can also enjoy life like others?

ps:also some1 plz tell me how to use these emoticons..!!

LittleMissMuffet · 09-14-2006

Hey SareyBarey,
Eversince I was a small child I have hated collars or jumpers being tight around my neck. The difference being that I never considered this a phobia, but just that my neck was very sensitive to material and needed to be kept free. I really don't consider that a phobia. I don't know the difference between you and me with that. Perhaps you just have a sensitive neck like I do, and perhaps it became a phobia after this. ...I don't know.

However, as far as fears of strange things are concerned.... I've had fears of various social situations for a long time; and each of these seemed to change according to what I was used to feeling more nervous about. And when I recently last had a job, I was able to calm my self around others to some extent; but fell apart when they played music (often really loudly) in the room. ...My 'phobia' or fear was that I would emotionally connect/feel too much the mood and lyrics in the song and that I would 'personalise' it, and that people would sense how strongly reactive I was (impressionable, emotional, self-centred as well) and think me strange, emotionally retarded or whatever. ...which ofcourse, being afraid of all this, is exactly what happened. ...That was extremely embarrassing, because nobody seemed to be able to fathom why I felt the way I did and I knew that it was ridiculous but could not stop my emotions anyhow. Quite awful how most people simply don't understand at all (some are actually remarkably cruel in fact).

I have wondered how to 'control' such a thing because I already learnt (on my own even) the principles of cognitive behavioural therapy. ...Lately I have come across information whereby people with difficulty with control can learn to simply at will make themselves calm and recondition their mind to be able to actually do what they want when they want.

Another poster recommended this in another thread (so you can ask if you want).

Tom Measer, I think that your advice is very good. Meditation is one thing my therapist suggested, and I can better see now how the purpose was to develop the skill -of relaxing the self at will- that you mentioned helped to neutralise a phobia. ...Phobias are incidious: a lot of focus and control is needed to stop them from continuosly coming back to ruin a person's peace of mind.

wrestler · 02-09-2008

hey i have the same thing. ive had it seince i was a lil. all my shirts have steched out colllars. my freinds alway mess with me and touch my neck just because it bugs me. but i have not found a way to fix it my bro tried a couple times by making me put tight things on my neck. but it dose not help. the weird thing is when i wrestle i dont normaly fell it. but there are time i do. but like u it only bothers me when i think about it. and i just got my licence to but it dosnt seem to bother me that much cus i drive with one hand and if it dose bother me i just fix it. if u do find a way to help it plz tell me im kinnda geting tird of it.

Nijuichi-chan · 03-06-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by dream_j

Quote:

Originally Posted by sareybarey919

I have this crazy thing where the collar part of my shirt absolutely CANNOT touch my neck or i will freak out. So constantly throughout the day i have to hold my shirt away from my neck, so its like i am living my life with one hand. I can take it away for a while if im not really thinking but the second i remember it like completely freaks me out and i cant go on without pulling it away. Its hard for me because i hide this from my parents because when they used to know about it they sent me straight to therapy, which totally made it worse because then i felt like i was crazy or something, so i bought a bunch of polos that didnt bother the part of the neck that "cant be touched" (its like that little indention between your collar bones where you can push it in) and i "got over it" which got me out of therapy and put my parents under the impression that i was all better. So for the last year everything has worked out fine because i just do it at school and stuff when they arent around, but now that i am starting to drive and my mom makes me drive with two hands it makes me crazy because i feel it then like worse than ever so i am completley having like these mini panic attacks behind the wheel, which is most likely pretty dangerous. I am desperate and have dealt with this problem for at least 4 years so please if you know anything help me out.

Get over it...learn to like you shirt touching your neck.
Love Dat COTTON!

Sorry, but I believe "Get over it" is BS advice that basically tells a person that you don't care enough to actually take their problems seriously. Most problems can't be solved in an instant. It takes a step-by-step process to actually resolve an issue. I mean, if you told a smoker to "get over" his smoking habit, do you really think he'll stop smoking? Next time, why don't you try to offer something thoughtful instead of a brushoff statement.

quietlyobserving · 03-22-2008

wear a 'turtle neck' underneath, that way you wont be able to feel the shirt. or a scarf..