Hey, thats sounds really interesting, I'm a software developer too, for the biggest software house in the world, the one we all love to hate
I know exactly what you're feeling, its really scary working on something that so many people are going to be relying on, but you already know you are good at what you do so trust yourself. I find that although I'm retarded in meetings, people don't really care because they respect my knowledge and the code I produce. To be in the position you are in means you are obviously great at what you do so be proud of yourself...
Everyone tells me that I'm good at what I do, and to some extent I can't deny it's true. I love programming and working with computers, plus online education is something I've always been interested in... but I worry that I may not be "good enough". I feel like the "slightest" problem could shut everything down. If I make a mistake, our system could be hacked, shut down, hijacked, and while in most cases I could probably have it up and running again, that would not only be extremely embarrassing, but could also cause huge legal issues. I'm sure it's just paranoia... My boss values me greatly, and he says all the time that he couldn't replace me... I just wish my subconscious could accept those facts too. I'm sure I'd feel better if valuing myself was an internalized thing, and didn't require conscious effort.
I think you should be proud to work for Microsoft, assuming that's who you meant
lol. I think that the majority of people bash Microsoft and other companies like that so much because they are so big and wide spread. Think about it, if there is an issue with Windows, it affects almost everyone, so naturally lots of people make a fuss about it. People can say what they want, I don't know what I'd do without Microsoft. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a Mac or Linux hater at all. No company or product will ever be perfect, they're all made by people after all. :
: I figure why should I complain so much when something goes wrong? What program, web page, or game have I ever made that was bug/glitch free? None.
You're part of the largest and most famous team of programmers in the world! I'd imagine a lot more people will experience benefits in their lives from your and your team's programming than anything I've ever helped program. Every program has flaws and a lot of bugs just can't be found until the software is thoroughly tested in the field. You just can't test every scenario "in a lab" (or in the IDE, in the case of programming). Thank goodness for updates! (well, thank goodness for the ones that don't result in blue screens of death, lol)