How are you feeling?

[Lavinialuna]

I am still not feeling well. I have a long miserable virus called CMV (related to mono and chicken pox.) Most people don't even get symptoms but the autoimmune disease has made it possible for the virus to settle in and make me miserable. I am desperate to feel better, sadly it can take several months for it to clear up and it never totally leaves your body so it cold possibly come back in my lifetime. How did I get so lucky?mg:

 

[desery]

I guess my only close friend before doesn't like me either now

 

[dottie]

I am still not feeling well. I have a long miserable virus called CMV (related to mono and chicken pox.) Most people don't even get symptoms but the autoimmune disease has made it possible for the virus to settle in and make me miserable. I am desperate to feel better, sadly it can take several months for it to clear up and it never totally leaves your body so it cold possibly come back in my lifetime. How did I get so lucky?mg:

Sounds terrible. How did you get it?

 

[Lavinialuna]

Sounds terrible. How did you get it?

Probably from one of the kids? I guess the stats are that 80% of the population has had it by the time they are 40, but most don't get many symptoms (if any at all.) The lupus makes me vulnerable to a more exaggerated reaction. Yuck. The glands in my neck have been swollen for weeks.

 

[Lavinialuna]

I guess my only close friend before doesn't like me either now

Sorry to hear that. :sad: Hang in there!

 

[Graeme1988]

Seen better days, if ah'm honest.

Went fur a wee wander in electric wheelchair, doon the street tae ma local shop, hud a look aboot, didnae buy anythin' coz ah hud'nae planned tae go, so didnae huv money wi' me. Ah'm thinkin' aboot movin' away tae Dumfries, git a place o' ma ain. Move away fae the wee borin', shitehole, toon ah've grew up in. Move away fae ma dyfunctional family.

 

[Opaline]

Probably from one of the kids? I guess the stats are that 80% of the population has had it by the time they are 40, but most don't get many symptoms (if any at all.)

Sounds like... herpes

Not saying you have herpes btw. Just weird how similar they sound in terms of prevalence and not showing symptoms. "Healthy" carriers. Freaky stuff. Hope you feel better soon :/

 

[worrywort]

I've had a bad day today. I just kinda gave up. I've got lots of things I should be working on but sometimes I just feel.....ergh.....so tired and defeated and like, what's the point? But I feel like this sadness that I feel right now, I feel like it's the truth. It's trying to tell me something, and all my other days when I go about my daily chores, they're just a cover. A way to block out the sound of days like today. I just feel so utterly defeated by life. I feel so f***ing sad man. And kinda pissed off too. I feel so lonely, and I know it's wrong to indulge in self pity but I just haven't got the energy to censor myself right now. I know I should think positively. I know there are answers out there that have pulled me out of this hole before, but it's like I don't want to hear all that crap again. All that pseudo faith and gratitude bullshit. I demand a real answer right now, from my maker. Why do I feel so shitty? Why do I feel like the world has forgotten me? Why do I feel like I've been missed out? Haven't I been trying hard enough? What about all the good things I've done, and all the sacrifices I've made? All the hours of effort? Where's the payoff? What was it all for?

It's weird cause I know what's gonna happen. I'm gonna wake up tomorrow and start afresh and put this day behind me, and I'm gonna think to myself, "look, you have a choice in life. You can either wallow in self pity and misery, or you can just give life a go. Just jump in and get messy and see what happens". And that's what I'll probably do. I'll start the wheels churning all over again, until another week or two when it all grinds to a halt again like today.

I really worry that my social problems are the root of most of my malaise. This constant feeling of disconnection with other people. I feel like what people mean to me is changing. Other people are becoming like data processing machines to me. I only interact when I have information that needs transferring. All around me are faces brushing past me. My soul is full up with a beautiful haze but nobody knows it. Other people moaning about their bosses, complaining about money, all hustling down the wrong avenues in the wrong directions. I dunno, I've lost my train of thought

 

[Lavinialuna]

Sounds like... herpes

Not saying you have herpes btw. Just weird how similar they sound in terms of prevalence and not showing symptoms. "Healthy" carriers. Freaky stuff. Hope you feel better soon :/

It's from the same group of illnesses actually, like chicken pox, and like chicken pox rebounds later in life like shingles, this can re-surface as well. Luckily this virus has no shankers
This is what it says about it:
"Most people infected with CMV do not have any symptoms. Acute CMV infection may cause infectious mononucleosis-like symptoms such as fever, enlarged lymph nodes, sore throat, muscle aches, loss of appetite, and fatigue.

In people with a suppressed immune system, CMV infection can attack different organs of the body and may cause blurred vision and blindness (CMV retinitis), lung infection (pneumonia), diarrhea (colitis), or inflammation of the liver (hepatitis) and inflammation of the brain (encephalitis) with possible behavioral changes, seizures, or coma."

Nasty stuff, hope it doesn't come to any of that stuff in the second paragraph!
Today I feel like I have motion sickness, I'm exhausted and have body aches. I've been dealing with this since Oct. 5th so I am more than sick of it! :thumbdown:

 

[Psychedelicious]

feeling

^That definitely doesn't sound fun Luna :/. I really hope you feel better soon.

 

[Psychedelicious]

what huh

I am feeling extremely conflicted about what I am doing right now. It really isn't bad or wrong or anything of that sort (I don't think anyways?), but I'm perplexed about that as well. It just feels so... weird? I had the inclination this couldn't possibly end in a pleasant fashion even if it seems to be going well at the moment. I hope my mind changes on that, but my mind is so messed up that it's never going to have a clear cut idea and stick with it. I still have no clue what exactly is going on or what I'm doing, it's too much to get into. I'm sure I'm just over-thinking nothing and making a big deal out of it but it's causing more stress than could possibly be necessary. I wish I could just breathe and take this all in like a normal person, but I can't shake the feeling this is all going to end in some kind of a catastrophe.

 

[Lavinialuna]

Re: what huh

I am feeling extremely conflicted about what I am doing right now. It really isn't bad or wrong or anything of that sort (I don't think anyways?), but I'm perplexed about that as well. It just feels so... weird? I had the inclination this couldn't possibly end in a pleasant fashion even if it seems to be going well at the moment. I hope my mind changes on that, but my mind is so messed up that it's never going to have a clear cut idea and stick with it. I still have no clue what exactly is going on or what I'm doing, it's too much to get into. I'm sure I'm just over-thinking nothing and making a big deal out of it but it's causing more stress than could possibly be necessary. I wish I could just breathe and take this all in like a normal person, but I can't shake the feeling this is all going to end in some kind of a catastrophe.

Thanks for the well wishes, and I extend them back to you.. I hope you feel better about your situation soon!

 

[dottie]

Feeling queesy. Ebola test?

ETA:

Angry and stressed out.

ETA:

It is the traffic. SO MUCH TRAFFIC.

 

[springk]

My life is so complicated.

 

[Graeme1988]

Alone, as per usual. :sad:

Desperately wantin' tae git ma surgery, rush the rehab process, then... Get the f**k away from the people who've made ma insufferable. :kickingmyself:
Well, it's either that or get masel' sectioned under the Mental Health Act.

 

[Nanita]

It's 1.24 pm. My therapy session begins at 2 pm. I should probably get ready to go but I am too lazy and I feel nervous about going out in public, as usual.

 

[springk]

Confused at the meaninglessness of everything.

 

[Opaline]

Third (or fourth?) day with a migraine. Woke up with it. Had to call out of work. Feel so stressed too. Three work days on top of full-time class is too much. Next semester I'll see if I can just do two days I think.

Lately I seem to go weeks without any migraines, even under stress, but then I'll get one several days in a row. I see a cycle. Can migraines follow a seemingly arbitrary cycle like that? What would only trigger them several days in a row once a month or so? ...menstrual cycle? Hmmmmmmm.

 

[Lavinialuna]

Third (or fourth?) day with a migraine. Woke up with it. Had to call out of work. Feel so stressed too. Three work days on top of full-time class is too much. Next semester I'll see if I can just do two days I think.

Lately I seem to go weeks without any migraines, even under stress, but then I'll get one several days in a row. I see a cycle. Can migraines follow a seemingly arbitrary cycle like that? What would only trigger them several days in a row once a month or so? ...menstrual cycle? Hmmmmmmm.

Yep, they can cycle like that. Hormones can trigger them, but weather changes among other factors can do it too.
I used to have migraines almost weekly that progressed into a period of vicious cluster headaches everyday at 3 pm. for several months. My right eye would droop, it was horrible. Then all of a sudden they stopped. The migraines barely happen anymore either, mostly with pms or with storms. Not sure what causes them but I wish they would put more research into it. So very many people out there suffering.
Long story short, I hope you feel better. No fun at all.

 

[kihira]

A complete mental mess