It can't realistically be everyone except you, can it? Maybe there's some selection criteria you're not accounting for that draws the wrong people to you.
If you've got any ideas, I'd love to hear them. Logic is a wonderful tool... until it doesn't get results.
I'd like to believe that other people are good and capable of genuinely caring about others, for more than just how useful they are or how validated they can make someone feel. I'm just too tired to keep an open mind anymore after two decades of this treatment, starting with my family whose first use for me was to vent to me as a small child about adult problems like money, the workplace, and all the criminals out there who shot up schools and wanted to abduct me.
My mother taught us to lie to child services and put us in two different physically and psychologically abusive households. She knew what was going on and went through it herself, but wouldn't let us be taken and--despite being the breadwinner--wouldn't leave so that we would be safe. What, after all, would we matter compared to her desire to appear as a good mother, satisfy her own demons in those marriages, and keep us close?
What could my safety and happiness ever possibly matter to a human being compared to their own wants?
In theory that's how it works there's a lot of stuff that can go wrong though aside from methanol poisoning. Theres so much to think about safety wise. You'd have to be vigilant about having perfectly working apparatus, calibrated thermometer, proper ventilation, avoiding superheating and pressure build up. Distillation needs to be given time too if done too quickly the vapors don't have time to condense or the condenser isn't working properly those vapors pose a real safety hazard. Theyre extremely flammable and unfortunately that happens. Home distillation unless you really know what you're doing is just not safe in my opinion and even if you do I just think you really need a proper lab set up. I really wouldn't recommend it
