anger

[Chilling__Echo]

grr, i'm beginning to realize that i have an anger problem. i think. :?: i really need to go see a counselor (i'd rather see an psychiatrist b/c there i can just tell them about how i feel about my disorder and how it affects me, not my whole life story and little things that happen. i can talk about my disorder but going too in depth scares me). very often now, for the past few months i just feel exhausted emotionally. i'll get so on edge over the littlest things and i let it build up inside me. i cannot let things go. eventually i begin to feel like i want to get back at the whole human race. i hope i never meet any of you on the road...

but at the same time i don't want to express these feelings to anyone. i feel like people think i use putting a label on something as an excuse. because for some reason these days, it's "cool" to have a mental disorder and to have to take pills. i just know what i feel and i think no one would believe me. i also felt this when going through be diagnosed with SAD

so anyway, does anyone else feel like they have an anger problem? and do you think it has anything to do with SA? i think alot of mine comes from pride which goes back to SA.

 

[Fredscars]

i think i have a few..things which could be connected as an anger problem but ive almost swallowed them and from that ive caused more emotional problems..if that makes sense. i never show anger but i am very...unpredictable emotionally.

 

[unleashed]

I think we have to accept our anger, look at it, allow it to be. we can use it in a positive way or we can just use it to be destructive either to self or others. either way anger is a natural inevitable emotion.

 

[GettingThere]

On the positive side, I think that a reaction of anger is definately preferable to a reaction of depression which is just an awful thing. Watch that you don't let the SP thing break your spirit.

As Unleashed said, if you channel your anger in a positive way than it is probably not too bad a thing.

 

[Hamble]

I agree echo, I think pride has a lot to do with it. I am too proud and because of my SP I get very angry and frustrated with myself and somtimes with other people.
I dont think you need to see a therapist over it, unless of course your anger is involving the use of a baseball bat on an unsuspecting bf :?
I think what you're experiencing is normal, especially considering all that you have had to deal with. All a psychiatrist will do is teach you relaxation techniques or prescribe drugs...which you don't want.

When I feel anger I just go into the bedroom and lay in the dark somtimes listening to music and think things through, but somtimes it leaks out and I take things out on close loved ones (not physically! although I have thrown the odd mobile phone / cushion on the floor :roll: ).
Excercise is also a good way to channel out any anger / frustrations. That and beer.

 

[LazerCarp]

I'm horribly angry 99% of the time, its just frustration really at not being able to get on with people but it displaces.

 

[Chilling__Echo]

masterpiece, you couldn't have put it better. if any one thing was the most affected by SA, it would be my temper. if i feel like someone is mocking me, or treating me like i'm ignorant, it hits that *pride* nerve that goes back to SA and i feel like i'm going to loose my mind. and i also have a horrible habit of holding grudges. i'm still anger over things that happened years ago. especially if people use me, that gets me going too. so all that stays inside and builds up till it boils over.

at this point it's a no win situation. if i don't say anything and stay *civil*, i feel like shit because then i feel like the person won't know how i feel. if i lash out i feel bad later, really guilty.

so yeah, i got my work cut out for me.

 

[Scrabbl]

No no no no... sorry guys but i forgot to explain myself. What I mean is what link does SA have with pride, not anger.

I don't know if this is related... Maybe this is what they're talking about: People with SAD are very aware of their actions. Everything must be done perfectly, especially things that are your pride. So if you're supposed to be good at something, then everytime you make a little mistake you'll blame yourself forever. while other people wouldn't even notice it.

 

[MadCat]

I guess that's what makes me completely different then. I don't make the mitakes, I am defective in the first place. Everyone does the mistakes for me. I don't talk responsibility for other peoples actions and they are generally all out to emotionally hurt me. Thing is, I don't know if this is real or not. I'm pretty much the opposite from anger, I feel very hurt most of the time. Don't think I give a damn about pride either.

 

[Chilling__Echo]

No no no no... sorry guys but i forgot to explain myself. What I mean is what link does SA have with pride, not anger.

mmm, maybe i'm speaking for myself, i've heard a couple of others agree before but then again it's different for everyone, i think SA and pride go hand and hand in that we assume that people will look at us and judge us, and negative things will come from it. this hits on our self-esteem and our pride (i believe). erg can't explain it, i'll give an example:

you have to give a speech

you may not want because of SA/SP

part of that fear is a fear that people will be able to tell that you're afraid (this might be where i'm speaking for myself)

Pride: at this point it's easy to get frustrated because you feel so socially handicapped but at the same time you see the person you are inside and feel that you should be as capable as everyone else. who is anyone to judge you and pick you apart like we're all afraid they will?

i'm sure this is flawed, it was harder than i thought to explain the relationship but it's just how i find things connecting up in my brain. i hope that made sense

 

[MadCat]

Made sense to me I guess.

part of that fear is a fear that people will be able to tell that you're afraid

I thought that this was one of the primary features of SA/SP?

 

[Fredscars]

you have to give a speech

you may not want because of SA/SP

Pride: at this point it's easy to get frustrated because you feel so socially handicapped but at the same time you see the person you are inside and feel that you should be as capable as everyone else. who is anyone to judge you and pick you apart like we're all afraid they will?

thats what i have all the time, i get so angry that i cant do things that i know that i have the intelligence, or the interest to do..but i cant because of the belief that people watch me. I get such an intense..uncontrollable thrust of pride that can reduce me to tears, or anger or some stupid action because of it.
Its like i did this maths test recently..now im not good at maths but i try...there was this topic i understood and revised for, but i got 52% in the test, i guess i panicked or something. Anyway, i was annoyed at myself, but i knew that i understood the topic, but my teacher literally screamed at me for not trying and being moody and obstructive (i say nothnig during class at all) and she took completely no notice that i had done over 3weeks worht of the topic in lessons getting every question right..
my pride took over and i couldnt stand it, i couldnt understand why she picked on me and hated me so much. i was stupid. i walked out of class, then went to the toilets to cry.
thats pride, and thats SA interlinked.

 

[Scrabbl]

thats what i have all the time, i get so angry that i cant do things that i know that i have the intelligence, or the interest to do..but i cant because of the belief that people watch me. I get such an intense..uncontrollable thrust of pride that can reduce me to tears, or anger or some stupid action because of it.
Its like i did this maths test recently..now im not good at maths but i try...there was this topic i understood and revised for, but i got 52% in the test, i guess i panicked or something. Anyway, i was annoyed at myself, but i knew that i understood the topic, but my teacher literally screamed at me for not trying and being moody and obstructive (i say nothnig during class at all) and she took completely no notice that i had done over 3weeks worht of the topic in lessons getting every question right..
my pride took over and i couldnt stand it, i couldnt understand why she picked on me and hated me so much. i was stupid. i walked out of class, then went to the toilets to cry.
thats pride, and thats SA interlinked.

It's not normal for your teacher to say that; that's really prejudiced.. That is really the worst thing can happen to a student to stop him from learning.
I'm quite the opposite.. Fred What grade are you in? As far as I know grade 10 math _is_ confusing so far, especially with the trigonometry and graphing lines, but our tests had been really easy. At least I find it easy. I do get bad marks tho. Well Not in maths, but in a course we have called Communications - a course dedicated to TALKING. There's frequent speeches, presentations where you go up and present to the whole class.. But anyhow, I think the most dangerous thing SP can do that makes you fail is, once you get 1 bad mark, you'll get really frustrated and you'd tell yourself "I suck in that subject". And then you're pretty much doomed. You can't let 1 bad mark ruin everything.
Okay I'm probably wandering off topic now.
But the key to this thing is to consciously accept your mistakes, this is what my psych told me. Other people makes mistakes all the time; we're human beings too so why can't we make mistakes. We deserve to do so.
It's going to really help if you think like that. And that's how I managed to get above 70 percent in the Communications course.

 

[Chilling__Echo]

i feel ya fredscarecrow, sometimes i wonder why some teachers even became teachers at all. i've had something similar happen to me like that. alot of the time i feel like i wish i had said more in the situation to stand up for myself but when i start feeling anxious, i just can't, like my body can only function half as well as usual.

i was just at the dentist and all of a sudden there were alot of people in the room for whatever reason and it was time for me to leave and as i was getting out of the chair, i almost lost my balance, just because i was trying so hard NOT to fall.

i also relate to you seek, me and my dad have always had problems, just because we've grow up in two completely different ways (he grew up in old south, i'm more contemporary obviously). unfortunately there's nothing anyone can do about the world (would be kind of scarey if we all had that ability :wink: ) as for ignoring it, haha i hope you're better at it than i am! :roll:

 

[Fredscars]

It's not normal for your teacher to say that; that's really prejudiced.. That is really the worst thing can happen to a student to stop him from learning.
I'm quite the opposite.. Fred What grade are you in? As far as I know grade 10 math _is_ confusing so far, especially with the trigonometry and graphing lines, but our tests had been really easy. At least I find it easy. I do get bad marks tho. Well Not in maths, but in a course we have called Communications - a course dedicated to TALKING. There's frequent speeches, presentations where you go up and present to the whole class.. But anyhow, I think the most dangerous thing SP can do that makes you fail is, once you get 1 bad mark, you'll get really frustrated and you'd tell yourself "I suck in that subject". And then you're pretty much doomed. You can't let 1 bad mark ruin everything.
Okay I'm probably wandering off topic now.
But the key to this thing is to consciously accept your mistakes, this is what my psych told me. Other people makes mistakes all the time; we're human beings too so why can't we make mistakes. We deserve to do so.
It's going to really help if you think like that. And that's how I managed to get above 70 percent in the Communications course.

im 15..year 10 over here..yeh shes quite a..wierd teacher. she has a very short temper and shes only just learnt my name..but yeh..my family is great at maths but im not..and i take critism really badly..but yeh, as chilling_echo says sa and pirde really are interlinked, and can have rather..bad effects. Im certainly glad i dont have communications lessons..sound horrible!! but im doing my best with stuff at the moment and im getting better at talking in class.

ugh, i hate going to the dentist chilling_echo..especially sitting in the chair with the dentist staring at you and asking if youve had any problems with your teeth..cant deal with it.lol