Amaranth
Member
I was just curious to know if anyone feels like me. I am a 23 year old female, almost 24. I've only had one boyfriend in my life (and that was a joke that only lasted a month). I've never been on a date. All of my friends are in relationships, in fact, everyone around me seems to be. I feel really naive when it comes to romance and dating, and my friends don't like to talk to me about their realationships often because they don't want me to feel bad. I just feel really left out. Actually, I wish I could turn off this part of me that desires to find a man. I know that a man will not make me happy and I must find happiness from inside..blah, blah. I realize that not everyone is meant to be in a relationship. But I also realize that it is human not to want to be alone. I'm not asking for marriage. I couldn't imagine myself married at this point in my life. All I want is to be dating, to be figuring out what kind of guy I want.
I have asked guys out before but I've been met with this indirect rejection. They don't tell me they are no interested, but they don't call me, or they make excuses.
I know that I could accomplish so much if I could just conquer this Social Anxiety Disorder. I talk to a few people, but I am generally silent due to my fear of criticism, my fear of looking stupid or foolish. Many people must think I'm aloof. Also, I'm about to graduate and I'm afraid I won't get a good job because of this weakness. When I'm in class and the professor calls on me or I get the feeling that he/she might call on me I get a panic attack where my heart feels like it's going to jump right out of my chest. What's sad is I have not always been this inhibited. I used to be outgoing as a child, but there must have been a turning point at some point during my childhood.
Anyway, I just want to know if I'm alone in feeling this way...
I have asked guys out before but I've been met with this indirect rejection. They don't tell me they are no interested, but they don't call me, or they make excuses.
I know that I could accomplish so much if I could just conquer this Social Anxiety Disorder. I talk to a few people, but I am generally silent due to my fear of criticism, my fear of looking stupid or foolish. Many people must think I'm aloof. Also, I'm about to graduate and I'm afraid I won't get a good job because of this weakness. When I'm in class and the professor calls on me or I get the feeling that he/she might call on me I get a panic attack where my heart feels like it's going to jump right out of my chest. What's sad is I have not always been this inhibited. I used to be outgoing as a child, but there must have been a turning point at some point during my childhood.
Anyway, I just want to know if I'm alone in feeling this way...