argh! im sick of this!

[txjeepin]

Do you ever feel like you are just not yourself? Lately my anxiety has quadrupled its presence in my life and my whole body shivers with nervousness. Just now someone came to my dorm room unexpectedly and caught me off guard. I was so nervous I could barely talk (they were helping my study). This is almost involuntary as I had no idea this person was going to come to my room so I did not build it up in my head prior.

I just don't feel like myself anymore. Everything I do and say seems like someone entirely different than who I really am. This feeling leaves me speechless because I don't know what to think anymore. I don't want to live like this.

 

[MizzSoSo]

Yep, you're just not 'normal'.

OK, so that sounds mean, but it's what everyone else does; anitcipating friends in their dorm room. I mean, that's what universities require (at least my Mi State U did) during the first year. They want to make SURE you are a well adjusted person!!! All you have to do is psyche yourself out that YES people are going to 'visit' you, even see ya take a piss or pull the underwear out of your ass (you gotta keep low there too) ... unless your ultimate desire is that NOBODY is to visit you and you are locked up into some kind of hole, or something.

You don't sound like you want that, so just deal with the 'violation' of the privacy that you haven't experienced this until now because like most SA people you haven't experienced socialization like normal people cuz you developed SA at your 'window of opportunity' (too young an age) which may or may not EVER be retrieved. But it's up to you. GO FOR IT!!!