BDS or what?

L

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
My socialphobia isn't so bad nowadays but I can't escape the feeling of being ugly. I know I'm not pretty, I been told that enough by so many people it must be true. People talk about body dismorphic syndrome but maybe thats just all bollox, maybe I am just plain old ugly. I can go into the shops one day and get on with things but then other days when I have to que or something I feel like the ugliest thing on this planet. I know no one is looking at me but i still feel so crappy on the inside that I sometimes just go back home and stay in for the rest of that day.
Does anyone else feel this way?

It doesn't happen all the time, just when theres a lot of people about. I even get paranoid about my fianc'e. Though I dont like to tell him as i know it hurts his feelings and I dont want to push him away cause deep down i know he does love me.
Wow, I haven't felt this crap in ages!
 
J

-Jp

Well-known member
yeah that'd be something good to do, it also releaves stress :D
i just bought the book men's health, the book of muscle :winkwink:

but i know a little what you are talking about, i have been called ugly in the past and also the opposite (lots more ugly). i think when people start to tell you you're ugly it is because of you radiation? apearance? i'm not sure how to say it in english, i mean like when you feel good you have a positive radiation and you are pleasant to look at but when you are depressed and anxious on top of it you have an ugly radiation or non pleasant.

so when i'm depressed or down i'm sometimes bothered by the feeling people think i look ugly or unpleasant and i also feel this way a bit.

i don't think you're ugly, and i think 50% of beauty comes from radiation
 
L

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
lmao....it isn't my body i'm complaining about. Thats in great shape (not bragging..well I am...not..lol). Its my face I hate. At least if your too fat or too skinny you can wear clothes in a certain way to at least hide it a little but I can't really go around with a carrier bag on my head now can i...or maybe I can. Pfft!. I dont go around looking miserable, I smile lots. What more is there to do besides a head transplant?
I wear nice clothes...maybe not what your average joe would wear but I know they suit me, I have nice long black curly hair. i'm not sure what it is exactly about my face i hate. My cheeks mostly...i think...my bro used to call me hamster cheeks...sounds funny but it hurt alot, especially when I moved and a complete stranger called me that very name, I almost died. Geez, I hate whinging about this sorta thing but today I been having a really bad day so I thought it might help to write it all down here. I'll probably be fine tomorrow.
Anyways, thanks for replying :)
 
avid_merrion

avid_merrion

Well-known member
HI LILMISS :p

REMEMBER YOU ARE AWARE THAT YOU ARE THINKING IRRATIONALLY WHEN YOU HAVE THESE THOUGHTS ABOUT YOUR LOOKS SO YOU KNOW THAT THESE THOUGHTS ARE JUST NOT RELEVANT ALTHOUGH THE FEEL BLOODY POWERFUL THE TRUTH IS YOUR PROBABLY VERY PRETTY BUT YOUR ANXIETY OR SOMETHING FROM YOUR PAST HAS LED YOU TO BE HARD ON YOURSELF AT TIMES.

TAKE IT EASY GORGEOUS :wink:
 
L

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
Its sorta mad, its like i'm not wanting other peoples approval... its my own I need...does that make sense??...I think I'm going insane. Someone give me a kick up the bum, I need one.
 
L

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
Its sorta mad, its like i'm not wanting other peoples approval... its my own I need...does that make sense??...I think I'm going insane. Someone give me a kick up the bum, I need one.
 
Anonymous

Anonymous

Well-known member
Heya LilMiss! I doubt you're ugly... on another SA board I visit, many girls have had the same complaint, and then posted their pictures to "prove' it, and generally they were all very attractive!

I often think I'm ugly... but lately I've gotten enough compliments from enough different women (like 'yummy' and 'delicious'!! LOL) that I realize it's just my mind talking. When I'm in a good mood, and look in the mirror, I think I'm pretty damn cute :D

For what it's worth, this guy tends to find 'hamster cheeks' damn cute on a girl too... especially when the girl dresses like an individual (and not a Gap model wannabe clone or a frouffy perfume-drenched nose-in-the-air serial-emasculator "I'm hot and I know it" type either!! LOL)... are you sure you're engaged?? ;) LOL j/k
 
L

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
Hey J, your quite the little charmer aint ya ;)

I thought most guys like the girly girl types. I dont get any complimetns, the best one I get round where i live is oh look, theres the werid...lol. Maybe its because I'm english living in a small backwater welsh town...who knows.

Anyways, thanks all of you, at least its nice to know I have someone to whinge to.
 
loucat

loucat

Well-known member
you've got a beautiful face i've seen your photo on the gallery, but compliments can be hard to accept i know,
 
L

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
Awww your all so sweet. I feel silly for whinging about such a trivial thing now. ahh but it was once of THOSE days I guess. Thanks guys/gals x
 
Horatio

Horatio

Well-known member
LilMiss.. I can really relate to you. For me my uglyness is a BIG issue. I feel that because of how ugly I am Im simply not wanted. And I find it very difficult to think otherwise because I have never been told otherwise and people make fun of my looks all the time. Sure part of that is paranoia, eg: me thinking people are staring at or laughing at me. But having strangers come up to me and ask me if Im a guy or a girl or having people in church coming up to pray that God will heal my ugly looks is certainly not paranoia!

Ive been told Im ugly too many times to count and not once has anyone in person told me I am good looking or cute or anything.

Personally I wish that looks didnt have to matter but the truth wether we admit it or not is that looks make a huge difference as to how your treated, especially by the opposite sex.

And also the truth is that it hurts to be laughed at or told your ugly, thats probably one of the main reasons why I hate going out in public. I know that I am ugly and I am darn sick of people coming up to tell me.
 
L

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
Horatio, I know exactly how you feel. Its hard to cope with when you have personal attacks about the way you look. I have had it since I was a kid, ok, I know I'm not pretty but I really dont need people stating the fact. You sound like a decent preson and I think that is worth so much more than how you look. Just a shame a lot of people are so shallow.
I guess i'm a little luckier than you though, My fianc'e tells me how pretty i am all the time but I find it difficult to take the compliments.
Everyones advice it to ignore the nasty people but its hard because if your like me, as soon as you get home the depression and anger sets in. Anyway, I know I have other personal qualites that far out weigh what those idiots have and I'm sure you do to. Some day i'm sure someone will see you for what you really are, a decent guy with lots to give.
 
MRnomates

MRnomates

Well-known member
Hey lilmiss i don't wanna sound bad 2 you but how can you say your sp isn't so bad these days, what socializing do u do with others?
 
L

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
MrNoMates, I have got to the point of actually not wanting to socialise with others. I'm happy to go out with my fianc'e to the cinema, bowling, shopping or whatever but i have had no friends for so long that now it really doesn't bother me. I guess I only socialise when I go to see my ex bf, sounds odd i know but we stayed friends after we broke up and he looks after my other pets so I do talk to him a lot. So, i dont really feel I suffer from Sp that badly anymore. I also think that if a potential friend did come into my life I could cope with it. I have more of a problem with crowds and stuff these days but then again so does a lot of people. So i think that now i'm happy with what i have then my Sp is now not such a big problem. Just still have a problem with low self asteem though...trying to work on that.
 
MRnomates

MRnomates

Well-known member
I see what ya saying am bit like that lilmiss although i'd give the friend a miss,,,how are you with relatives its kool that u have a partner at least ya getting some of the good stuff
 
L

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
I'm ok with relatives but most of them live so far away I dont see most of them anyway.
Yeh its cool, I'm getting the good stuff...as you put it...lol.
How are you with your relatives?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top