Blushing

[clairet]

I know this is probably an oldie but I have missed past posts about blushing I think, and I just wanted to ask people if they blushed and in what kind of situations?

I find that I blush if I have to talk to somebody I don't like or I feel don't like me! Daft eh. I also blush when I have to talk to more than one person at a time (if I feel intimidated by/disliked by/or dislike any of the persons present!). Soooooo frustrating and embarrassing!

How bout you all? Do you blush in daft situations? (bar the obvious stuff like public speaking)

 

[Scottish_Player]

I have heard alot of people talking about blushing on here,i have most other symptoms of SA/SP but i never blush for some reason?

 

[clairet]

lucky you!! Actually I'm pleased for you, it is just another head ache in the good ole SP battle!

Does anybody know what ETS is? I read in another post that a girl got this and it treated her blushing. Is it the thing where they cut under your arms or something and do something to your nerves?

 

[Danfalc]

Hi clairet, i use to blush like most of the time, specialy when i was talking to people i didnt know, and to be honest even with most people i did know, not for any particular reason, just because i felt uncormfortable i guess, ive managed to stop doing it, either that or i dont realise im doing it anymore.That treatment you mentioned is supposed to be quite risky from what ive heard and cause more problmes than it solves.Anyways the best advice i can give you is not to focus on your blushing try and forget about it, i know that might sound impossible at the moment but it worked for me

 

[Mysti]

Hi Clairet

I blush too and I hate it. It's at its worst around teenagers. The local teens are at least 6 years my junior and I don't know why but I find them very intimidating, and for some reason this makes me blush and my eyes water.
I hate walking the dog in winter, infact I stopped taking her this year because I started to feel dizzy as well from anxiety, but in winter you can't wear sunglasses without getting strange looks and I find them essential even for passing someone in the street.

I'm fine talking to women, with men it depends on what vibes I pick up. A guy from the electric board visited the other day and that was fine. I found it very easy to chat to him, yet with the new vet I could barely make eye contact and felt my face getting hotter and hotter.

For some reason I usually make a lot of eye contact with people despite disliking social situations. It's fine until they return it then I tend to blush and lose my train of thought. I've always tried to maintain it as it's supposed to make others feel like you're interested in what they're saying. But then I always worry eye contact makes other people feel uncomfortable too so don't feel as if I can win.
Mine definitely depends on the person I'm interacting with and their body language.

 

[CheshireCat]

Hi clairet....I'm not sure if I was the girl you might have been refering to who got ETS for blushing...but either way I thought I'd share a little about it with you anyhow ;-). I realized my facial blushing when I was about 11 in 5th grade (I'm 20 now) giving a presentation to the class and remember feeling a burning sensation on my face. The other kids in the class teased me about it but it really never occured to me that it was an actual problem, I just thought I was shy. I didn't realize the extreminity of the situation until I continued to blush more often down the line right into h/s. Similar to you I blushed in front of more than one person...hell I even blushed while not talking to anyone. Anything could make me blush. Raising my hand in school to answer a question, dropping a pencil, and listening to uncomfortable topics being discussed in school (ughh those sex talks in health class! Many students were probably embarrassed about those though lol).

Long story short, I got fed up with blushing and searched for possible cures. I got pescription drugs, creams, makeup...you name it, I've tried it. Been to a few psychiatrists and a hypnotist. After awhile of reseach for cures I found ETS...approx. 2 years later I got ETS done at age 18. I found a doctor in Boston Ma. where I'm from who performed it. I had many consultations with him...and after trying every possible solution, I managed to get ETS done which I could explain to you but it's best if you look it up. A good site is called ESFB Channel, which includes forums and descriptions of facial blushing and ETS...it shares other peoples experiences with both as well, including many other things related to blushing. The site is http://www.esfbchannel.com/forum/. There are risky side effects I've found that people may get from the surgery such as compensatory as well as gustatory sweating which has a possibilty of occuring sometime after surgery, but so far I have been doing great.
It's been about a two years now and no blushing, burning, heat, or stares (well maybe the feeling of stares, I still have SA...it helped a little with that but not much for me). I think ETS is a good decision once understanding all of the effects and really trying every other possible solution to curing blushing. I'm not sure of the actual severity of your blushing but feel free to post more about it. I'd like to hear more and try to help you out if you'd like...I know it can be hard to deal with but I'm here if you ever want to talk.

 

[Nightshade]

Yuck, blushing, I hate it.

It was blushing that made me go to my doctor and ask for help. It wasn't like I was blushing all the time but certain people made me blush, certain words, certain phrases, it could be quite unpredictable and was totally destroying my confidence.

As an example, if someone asked me the question "do you know John (or Fred or Mary or whatever name), if I knew the person they meant, I would blush. Now probably someone once asked me "do you know so-and-so" and it was maybe someone I had a crush on but was too scared to admit, and then whenever I heard that phrase again it made me blush.

Also, if someone said the word "virgin", even if it was the record label or the airline they were talking about, then I'd probably blush (that would be because I'm a 33 year old...virgin, due to social phobia and I'm a bit sensitive about it).

Things have improved since I have been doing CBT on the recommendation of my doctor. The psychologist said a lot of things about blushing that I didn't believe, like "people might not even notice" and "you blush because you are having a problem with anxiety" and "if you do these techniques it will improve". I didn't believe her, but I did what she said, and it did actually improve. Even when I didn't believe her, she told me that was ok, just keep telling myself these things anyway. So I kept doing CBT things and saying to myself "I doubt anyone even noticed" and "it really doesn't really matter what they think anyway" and all that.

I still blush, but much less, and I'm just much less afraid of it. But I have to keep vigilant, and I have been slipping a bit lately. I need to do more practice still. I'm not seeing the psychologist, but I still have books on the subject and I work from them.

I read about the surgery, but when I did some reading about blushing I could see that I had a problem with social anxiety that caused blushing, rather than a problem with blushing, so I decided to try and deal with the anxiety, and so far I'm happy with that approach.