confidence

[Anonymous]

Normally i am a shy,nervous wreck around people.Blushing,heart pounding and my mind goes blank,especially around woman.But sometimes i can be completely at ease,funny and a great conversationalist, it really frustrates the shit out of me that i can't always be that way!Does anyone else experience this?

 

[Crimefish]

Within SA, there are "confidence swings". We're not continuously under one level or anxiety. That's why some days are easier than others.
The drawback is, you don't know when the good days will be so it's impossible to base plans on them, and also if you're okay one day, everyone expects you to be okay forever.

 

[Anonymous]

Or do they...?

 

[Crimefish]

Or do who do what?
Do people expect you to be okay forever? Well, whenever I have a good day, everyone acts like I'm cured, and they get all surprised when I go back to "normal" the next day.

 

[LilMissTragic]

Yeh I know how that one feels. My SP seems to have lain dormant for a few months, well not Dormant, just not that bad. Even I thought, hey wow, cool, I'm getting on with things. Then yesterday, me and my Fiance went to a cafe, where I sat, in a quiet corner, facing a wall. The place was near enough empty yet my heart rate soared, I started shaking like a leaf and I tried my hardest not to let it get to me. However, my fiance noticed and we got up to leave. The waitress made a snide comment about us wasting time which only added to my stress...usually i come out with something witty....not a bloody thing this time. I got out and couldnt hold back a flood of tears in the middle of the bloody town. I haven't felt that crap in ages. I did however manage to go on to another cafe and have something to eat. Not gonna be beaten that easily!!!

 

[Hype1010]

It's even worse if you are OK when you first meet someone, and can get on really well with them... But every other time you meet them they expect the 'same person' they met before and are treated to a completely socially awkrawd person instead.

Hype1010

 

[Anonymous]

It's even worse if you are OK when you first meet someone, and can get on really well with them... But every other time you meet them they expect the 'same person' they met before and are treated to a completely socially awkrawd person instead.

Hype1010

This is so true!That is part that really sucks!It seems like whenever i meet a woman i am attracted to it starts off by me being very charming,funny and personable.But i've noticed that the second time i see them i act uptight and aloof,leaving them wondering whats up with this guy? I can't count how many times this has happened,and i end up avoiding them all together.

 

[Anonymous]

i have all of that but without the ease,funnyness and great conversational

Are we talking about the same person? You are hilarious! :lol:

 

[GettingThere]

Or do who do what?

Do do the voodoo that you do.

 

[Anonymous]

lol

 

[lawyerguy]

Yeah I can relate. Around people I'm comfortable with..people I know won't judge me or people who's judgement's of me I don't really care about..I can be relaxed and pretty outgoing. I just wish I could transfer that feeling into other contexts. But around girls, job interviews, and social situation with unfamiliar people (especially attractive people) I get nervous and transform into a bubbling mass of inarticulateness.

 

[JWH]

Yeah, this would describe me. I go from shy to hyper - extreme to extreme. People have actually had to tell me to tone my voice down. It's all a nervous thing.