Helyna
Well-known member
Last night, my friend took me to the second dance I have gone to willingly. There were two I went to at French Conference, but if I didn't go to the dance, I would have sat in my hotel room bored out of my mind or had to watch a French movie that I probably wouldn't have understood. I was stiff and unhappy the whole time both times and couldn't dance at all. The other one I chose to go to was the end-of-eighth-grade dance, which I enjoyed but didn't actually dance at. This dance was connected to my friend's church, so I felt out of place as I walked in - I'm in Mormon-land and hardly know anyone, and I'm agnostic... please don't get out the torches and pitchforks...
It was too dark and very cold. I know from past times that dances must be cold at the beginning or we'd suffer later, but I didn't like it. The darkness also made it hard for me to see the faces of people I was being introduced to. So the beginning wasn't very comfortable.
Well, one of the first songs I heard was this one. I happen to really like it, but it just made me feel depressed. It's a song about a girl who can dance and people were dancing like they enjoyed it, but I can never do that. My feet and legs can move to the music, but my arms are hopeless. I feel stupid the moment my arms get involved, but you can't dance with them by your sides.
Well, my friend's friends were great, and my friend's sister got my dancing this silly dance from some TV show. We got a whole group of people doing it, and that felt good. I was actually moving, and I was in a group of people who don't laugh at or judge each other.
About halfway through, as if someone was watching over me (hey, it was a church dance), Dancing Queen came back. And I actually started dancing, or at least moving my whole body to the music. Arms and all. Something in my head kept telling me that I should worry about looking stupid, and I heard it, but it didn't take over. I just kept doing it - and singing, though nobody could have heard it. And it felt fantastic. I didn't care what I looked like! Some girls grabbed hands and started spinning in a circle, and I joined them. We were all spinning and singing, and I didn't want it to stop, because it felt so wonderful to be relaxed and enjoying this...
I danced for several songs after that. I can't really explain it, but I think you know how it felt... to realize that I could have so much fun in a situation I usually don't feel comfortable in...
So wonderful...
