Driniking and Anxiety.

[4seasons]

So last night I reached my final straw. I went out with my friend and his girlfriend downtown. Yes it was a third wheel deal but she decided to come out last minute. Anyway, I go down every now and then and its the same story, I stand around completely shit faced feeling like a loser then I go home. Every time I go out with them to all they say is "we need to get you a girlfriend" and shit like that. It makes me feel like a complete piece of shit because I can not do it. I can't approach a girl. So I ended up walking home last night almost crying thinking about how pathetic I am...I hit rock bottom for the first time in more then a year..i don't know what happened. Does anyone else get like this when they drink? I think it makes my anxiety 10 times worse and in turn makes me depressed. I have no one to talk to about this so I decided to start a thread on here. Let me know what you think.

 

[GKJB]

Yeah I get where you;re coming from man. There's nothing worse than people saying 'you need a girlfriend'. I get wound up and anxious when people just ask me whether I have one or not, because I expect a shitload more questions and for them to give me that funny look when I say no.

I'm usually way overconfident when I'm drunk, talk to anyone about anything and generally make a total arse of myself, especially in clubs. I'm not bothered about it while I'm still pissed, but the following few days, and sometimes weeks, I feel awful, ashamed and physically sick when I think about all the embarassing & stupid shit I'd done the night before.

So drink is really a good and a bad thing for SA for me. Good while I'm drunk, bad when I sober up.

 

[4seasons]

Seems like I'm the only one who stays quite when I drink. I can drink so much that i can barely walk...but I'm still shy and self conscious.

 

[Secret]

Yeah! It is so annoying! "We must find you a boyfriend!" and then I almost allways say:"If I want one, I will just get one, you don't have to find me one...and I really DON't want one..."...I want one but I've desided not that I will avoid falling in love cause hate blushing and can't talk to the ones I'm in love with unless I'm making me really cold towards them...QUITE -> NOT FUN;P ha ha... But when I drink I'm used get more loose and free with strangers without being so nervous... for not long ago I really had the longing and thought that "after school today it would be nice to buy some beers or barcardies... and then drink something and take a few in the morning and just be totally relaxed... AND that really scared me!! And I didn't do it (bought some beers after school) because I've promised myself never to drink more than once or twice a week and that's to parties...which I don't allways go to you know or just leave early mostly... normally I get quite happy, more open, talking and free then I'm used to be arround others then my friends and parents and it really helps me socially, because then I'm usually not so nervous and thinking about everything I do or not do and what they are thinking.

But I've tried the last couple of times that I became very depressed and just layed outside a mall in the evening for about 2 hours and after that I walked drunk everywhere;P because I didn't wanna go inside to the party, because I felt that no one wanted me there and no one thought I was nice, funny, pretty and all that shit;P...and I hadn't even been in there!;P... and didn't wanna go home because I didn't want to give my parents the impression of being unsocial... so I were out in the cold for about 4 hours...REALLY CLEVERxD

 

[4seasons]

Thats another thing with me. I never feel wanted. Whenever I try to go I feel like people try to avoid me because I'm simply not a fun person. I'm not sure if that the fact or if its in my head. My friends always say I should head out and shit like that but when the time comes to go out they're all doing their own thing. To be completely honest I'd be stoked if my friends girlfriend actually hooked me up with one of her friends some how, it would be avoiding a lot of the awkward steps like meeting a girl on my own. I'm not mad at them when they say that kind of stuff I'm just mad at myself because I can't do it.

 

[GloomySunday]

I don't drink anymore, mainly because it made my feelings of depression ten times worse. That's no real surprise though. Alcohol is a depressant drug. That's it's primary function.

In small or moderate quantities, its depressant effect is felt as relaxation, which is why people feel more sociable and at ease whilst drinking it. However, in larger quantities, it can totally debilitate you. In more ways than one.

I didn't stop drinking it just because of the way it made me feel, but also of the way it make me behave and come across to people. It really bought out the worst in me. The morning after a night out often turned into a post mortem, involving thoughts like "Did I really say that?" or "Oh, God. What the hell did I do that for?"

It has to be said, there's nothing more unattractive than someone who is worse for wear on drink.

If someone can't drink responsibly, then I honestly think it's best not to drink at all. I can't see what benefits it brings...except for a completely confused oblivion involving total loss of motor co-ordination skills and at least twenty trips to the Gents during the night!

 

[freestylemonster]

Alcohol is good and bad for me. Sometimes it makes me all depressed and I go into my room and cry, other times (most of the time) it makes me feel happy and pretty confident. I've been drinking a lot lately though, my friends say I have a drinking problem

I say don't stay away entirely from alcohol, but try to limit yourself to like 3-5 beers or something..

 

[GKJB]

Yeah I went through about a month or two where I got drunk every night (and day) bar 3 days. I was buying cheap cider at 1.20 per 2litres, getting 5-8 bottles and drinking throughout the day and night, waking up and carrying on, going to college drunk, going to meetings drunk, but I;ve gotta say that was some of the most fan I;ve had in a long time, although I do regret the way I acted a lot of the time, don't remember most of it so I ain;t too bothered.

 

[recluse]

Alcohol is ok in moderate quantities, but i think it's all too easy for socially anxious people in particular to become dependant on it just to be able to fit in. I hardly drink at all, i can honestly say that the last time i had any alcohol was a pint of beer with a meal back in August! Alcohol has never appealed to me much and to be honest i find it plays havoc with my anxiety levels.

 

[jschuley]

I read somewhere that forty seven percent of people with social anxiety disorder are also alcoholics, that is a staggering percentage, but not altogether surprising. I have a cup of vodka beside me right now, so that before I get up and face my roommates I can be loosened up.

I am also listening to Aimee Mann's "Wise Up" as I read this board right now, it kind of makes me want to kill myself. If I Was going to do it, this would definitely be the song I would listen to while i did it.

 

[GKJB]

I'm drinking tonight as well, not for any particular reason though, I just enjoy having a drink on my own now and again, i'll probably get through two bottles of wine tonight, tomorrow's the night when my best mate comes round each week. Thanks god I sorted things out with him, I felt dreadful for days after we had a row (because we were both drinking)

Drinks in tomorrow :lol:

 

[Moonie]

Drinking has helped me meet people and it has allowed me to experience things that I would not have experienced sober. Alcohol was very exciting to me shortly after I turned 21.

However, drinking is always a gamble for me. It has almost gotten me a DUI, it has put me in the hospital overnight, I have gone to work and school intoxicated. Many embarrassing moments with alcohol. Yet, I keep coming back to it. I just love the feeling of the first, good buzz. If I could feel like that eternally, I'd be happy. But I am a very all-or-nothing person. So, I usually go beyond a buzz. I can drink almost a whole bottle of vodka or so co. And I will tell myself, "Once I finish this bottle, I am done for awhile."

Now that I am just about 26, I don't go out much and I don't want alcohol to help loosen me up or to make me be fun and smily and alive and confident and brave. I want to seek that some other way. A natural way. My liver is probably shot. My looks have deteriorated because of it. It has embarrassed me.

I haven't had a binge drinking episode for a few weeks. I had had a cup of wine or two between those periods, though. But, I am scared that I will relapse again. I can go for periods of time without drinking, but when I drink.. I DRINK. So, I am trying to just avoid it all together. I know, for the most part, that I can't drink moderately.

 

[4seasons]

This is exactly what i'm talking about. Seems like I;'m the only who stay quite when I'm drunk.

 

[sde]

I've had a drink a few times and it just makes me feel sleepy and warm and sick. I might feel like I want to loosen up and have sex, but then I just go to sleep.

I'm not sure I see what going out for a drink with your friends has to do with finding a girlfriend (or boyfriend.) Could it be that your friend just wants to have a drink with you, and since you don't have someone to invite along as he does, he feels sorry for you and says, "We need to find you a girlfriend," just as something to say to show he notices and cares, but not really meaning to do anything about it immediately?

 

[4seasons]

It doesn't have anything to do it actually. Being out with them as a third wheel just makes me realize that I don;t really have any friends.

 

[GKJB]

^^^ feels terrible doesn't it. I went on holiday this year with my 3 sisters, their partners and my mum. Me and my mum were the only single people there, and while everyone else had someone to hold hands with and cuddle up to I was always alone. Thanks god I was drunk 90% of the time.