NightTimeForever
Well-known member
After I quit my job, I also severed pretty much all social connections with people that weren't immediate relatives. Is this typical for the SAer? I think my case is pretty extreme, but I'm not sure.
Friends?
- Thread starter NightTimeForever
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MikeyC
Well-known member
It sounds typical for someone suffering from social anxiety, but it's not a good thing. Now that you've quit your job and stopped seeing certain people, you're going to be left with a massive hole in your life that you're going to struggle to fill, and that's not going to do you any favours, especially once the negative thoughts creep in again.
NightTimeForever
Well-known member
Yeah, can't say that you're wrong.
montejocarlo
Well-known member
i also did that after my classmates graduated from college. & it was a huge mistake.
Not really. It's been on and off for me. I still keep in touch with some friends, but we're so far away and there's not much we can do together anymore. I'm not active on FB so that makes it harder to keep in touch. My friends aren't big on using email to keep in touch.
SilentAndShy
Well-known member
I'm doing the same thing as you. I left my job, got into had habits and not taken the initiative to stay in touch with my friends. So much so that one of my mates bumped into my brother and commented to him that he hadn't seen me in ages or been in touch! I panicked when my brother confronted me about it and mumbled a response.
I don't want to atm purely because my SA is affecting other things that impinge on my ability to meet up with them, car driving anxiety to put it.
I just hope they forgive me in the future if I decide to open up about my SA
I don't want to atm purely because my SA is affecting other things that impinge on my ability to meet up with them, car driving anxiety to put it.
I just hope they forgive me in the future if I decide to open up about my SA
LazyHermitCrab
Well-known member
It sounds like that friend misses you. Did he talk to your brother first? Either way I would start to talk to him again.
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SilentAndShy
Well-known member
It sounds like that friend misses you. Did he talk to your brother first? Either way I would start to talk to him again.
Yeah, my brother went into his workplace to get some groceries and it happened there. I'm not too sure if he misses me - I'm not one of his best bosum buddies but I can't imagine he's too missing me much. I might text him to see how he is but I just don't want too. I'm pushing my friends away a tad and I know it but I can't seem to muster any strength to socialise atm.
Bree1989
Member
I'm in the same boat. I have two friends, but they live very far away so we only communicate via email. I try my best to hang out with people, and right now I have two girls who I hang out with once in a blue moon. I have nothing in common with either of them, and don't particularly like them, but I feel like I shouldn't just discard them as friends because they're all that I have right now.
LazyHermitCrab
Well-known member
You should do it sooner, rather then later, since they recently talked. You could say i heard you ran into my brother! how have you been? and blah blah blah we should catch up and go laser tagging or another activity. Something similar happend to me. My mom ran into an old best friend of mine, but we parted ways in the past, due to some stuff. I added her on facebook and she seemed happy about it. We never met up though, i'm too scared and it's been 2 years. I would go for it in your case, definately.
LazyHermitCrab
Well-known member
Yes that would be so cool! I wouldn't want to raise my voice to talk to someone facing away though. Maybe texting? lol.
skins
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i think its fairly typical...i think we see it as being much harder work to maintain the friendships when you arn't forced to be in each other's company in a work environment. ive made the mistake of thinking that if they valued my friendship then they would take the initative to stay in touch, which obviously they didn't. Unless you refer to severing ties with non-work friends as well? i think this could be a mistake. When i was younger and didn't understand my social anxiety i'd pushed friends away thinking i wasn't happy being around them so i dont want them in my life...ive since realised the value of friendships and how hard it is make new friends as you get older, and i would never do that now. Its more the case now that friends would push me away, and i'd still try to maintain contact..not the other way around.