High School Hell

[DebbieDowner]

Was high school complete and total hell for you? Do you attribute your SA to experiences you had then?

High school was the worst time of my life. I had major depression, SA, hurt myself, attempted suicide and was locked up in an institution. I drank, did drugs and hung out with all the wrong people. My "best friend" told the entire school that I was in the institution, so when I came back I was treated like a complete and total freak, my classmates and teachers alike. Most of my teachers laughed when kids would make fun of me or just made fun of me themselves. I was once pulled over and surrounded by four police cars because they had had an "anonymous call" that I was a danger to myself. At one point my mother told me that she was embarrassed to be seen with me in pubic. I had an abusive, controlling boyfriend who would tell my parents that I'd hurt myself when really it was him. I did have friends, and some of them have become very good friends now, but not a single one stood by me or defended me when we were in high school and I felt completely alone. A group of girls made it their mission to harass and humiliate me every chance they got and one of them actually ripped the arm off of the sweater I was wearing with a nail file while trying to stab me with it (during a class...) but I was given a detention for it. In gym class, people would intentionally hit me with basketballs, baseballs, soccer balls, anything that was around really.

The moral of this ridiculous story? After high school things got a lot better. I went to college and met people who deserved to be my friends and treated me right, I discovered what I'm good at and ended up enjoying school, with a little self confidence I learned how to deal with my depression and sometimes I even felt a little less socially anxious. Even though today I'm doing pretty well outwardly, my SA has never gone away and I think a lot of it is due to the horrible time I had in high school and always fearing that people might treat me like they once did.

 

[Emily_G]

Most of it, yes. Somewhat had to do with my stuttering...but mostly just because I made stupid choices. And teens are jerks...

 

[BlueDays]

That is sad to hear you had to go through all of that Debbie, and without the support of your mother, that must have been really hard to bear
My primary school years were a similar hell to your high school years, and yes i do attribute my SA to those experiences of extreme torment. I am still left with the golden question of "Why me"?

 

[nopark]

It wasn't complete hell for me. I didn't particularly enjoy it, but it wasn't so bad. I was well liked, had a good group of close friends. But the SA did make it an uncomfortable experience, as well as some ongoing family problems. My absence record was pretty bad. I'd skip classes multiple times per week. But since my grades were generally pretty good, no one really said anything about it.

I got very depressed in my last year and dropped out for a bit. My mom managed to convince the school principal to pull some strings and I was lucky enough to graduate, making up the last few credits by working a "co-op" program out of the classroom.

I've not gone to college. I haven't ruled it out yet, but it just hasn't been in my cards yet. I'm put off by the lack of like minds. Everyone I talk to only cares about premarital sex and getting drunk or high. Not exactly my kind of thing.

 

[Anubis]

High School wasn't so bad for me. Partly because it's the age where a lot of kids generally mature and partly because I was in a few AP classes (with all the "nerds", lol).

Elementary school and part of middle school were the worst for me. That's when, I think, kids can be the most cruel and still be oblivious about it.

 

[LadyWench]

I didn't go to high school. I dropped out of 8th grade (middle school). THAT was hell for me. I've honestly never been treated so f*cking horribly in my life. I had panic attacks nearly every day because of all the stress. This caused me to miss a lot of classes, so I ended up failing 8th grade. That made me feel great!

Girls were always making fun of me and giving me a hard time. I never understood why. I was very quiet and kept to myself. I didn't go out of my way to talk to anybody, and I didn't really have any friends. There was a girl that was sort of my friend. She was nice to everybody, though. Probably the only person in that damn school that knew how to treat other human beings.

Anyway, I was given crap daily for being "fat" (even though I really wasn't at the time...but I am now, ironically). They also said I was ugly and stupid, and blah blah blah. Normal things. Girls are vicious, though. It's ridiculous. I never had this much trouble with males. It was always the goddamn females that were awful to me. Looking back, I'm sure it was because they were jealous I was already wearing a 32D bra at 14, and they still had to wear training bras. That's probably why they called me fat. I was wearing about a size 6 in jeans. Not fat at all! Yet, they still made a point to call me a fat bitch, fat whore, etc. You get it.

Now, most of these girls have kids with no fathers, they are on welfare and have no future for themselves. I don't have a future either. I have panic disorder and OCD. I'm going nowhere in life. But at least I didn't get knocked up at 16! I hate homo sapiens.

 

[BrokenSailor]

all of grade school was hell to be perfectly honest. Particularly 7th grade. Went to an all white (country type/southern) school where no one was exposed to anything beyond their race. Got picked on, spit on, threatened, had books thrown on me, etc all for looking Chinese even though I'm really not I'm philippino and puerto rican but still made me a target. Don't know how many times I was called a chink :/ kids are cruel. After that I became very self conscious about my looks...it was a rough time..if I could go back I'd stick up for myself cause I just let them bully me. I wish I could go back in time and kick their a**...someone invent a time machine!

 

[Liberty]

Was high school complete and total hell for you? Do you attribute your SA to experiences you had then?

High school was the worst time of my life. I had major depression, SA, hurt myself, attempted suicide and was locked up in an institution. I drank, did drugs and hung out with all the wrong people. My "best friend" told the entire school that I was in the institution, so when I came back I was treated like a complete and total freak, my classmates and teachers alike. Most of my teachers laughed when kids would make fun of me or just made fun of me themselves. I was once pulled over and surrounded by four police cars because they had had an "anonymous call" that I was a danger to myself. At one point my mother told me that she was embarrassed to be seen with me in pubic. I had an abusive, controlling boyfriend who would tell my parents that I'd hurt myself when really it was him. I did have friends, and some of them have become very good friends now, but not a single one stood by me or defended me when we were in high school and I felt completely alone. A group of girls made it their mission to harass and humiliate me every chance they got and one of them actually ripped the arm off of the sweater I was wearing with a nail file while trying to stab me with it (during a class...) but I was given a detention for it. In gym class, people would intentionally hit me with basketballs, baseballs, soccer balls, anything that was around really.

The moral of this ridiculous story? After high school things got a lot better. I went to college and met people who deserved to be my friends and treated me right, I discovered what I'm good at and ended up enjoying school, with a little self confidence I learned how to deal with my depression and sometimes I even felt a little less socially anxious. Even though today I'm doing pretty well outwardly, my SA has never gone away and I think a lot of it is due to the horrible time I had in high school and always fearing that people might treat me like they once did.

This sounds like a much worse version of my younger years. Starting after 10th grade or so.

High school for me was not pleasant at times. If I knew how to fight and stand up for myself though all of the problems would have been solved for the most part.

 

[shore_of_glass]

highschool was a mix of good and evil for me.

I was put in a class where most students were 2, 3 years older than me because they'd failed previous years. And half of the ones that were my age were my.... friends.
When I wasn't being bullied and humiliated, I tried desperatly to fit in (yes, fit within the bullies) although I didn't act like them. Of course, I failed. Girls who were older (like 1, 2 years) would look at me like I'm a kid and the ones my age, with who I was very nervous to talk with, looked at me as the geek of the class, ignoring me.

This went on for about 3 years. The result was 0 social skills. I mean 0.

The next 2 years were with people my age. I barely knew how to say hello, how to engage in a conversation or how to say something funny. I was a robot. People would look strangely at my actions thus making me feel weird. Try and failure was my way of "learning" wich made me more introverted.

Then the xmas holidays came. After that I suddenly (don't know how) got some standard social skills. I'd become a bit of a jokester, but still learning some jokes that would fit the social environment. Of course, my way with women didn't improve.

My male friends would see my as the jokester that told some unusual jokes and made them laugh a bit, but I was still the weird one. And I still got picked on, althought I was the tallest one (yeh but skinny as ****). They had that teen evilness in them, but were friends.... I think. When I was alone with one of them they would talk with me right. Together they weren't that great. One of them was my best friend of the time, he understood me the most, although not enough.. this went on for 2 years.



And then last year of high school. New colleagues. My age, but more mature. My "best friend" left my class, diferent subjects. By being more mature, they would look at me like a child, the weirdo that sometimes doesn't come near to say hello and just nods... Still, a nice class, most were nice to me. We would play cards and stuff, kinda socialize. In this class I met my best friend, the one that still lasts and probably will last for long, you could say "true best friend".

Now I'm in college, socialy inapt and looking back wishing I was back in highschool, but only for the last 3 years, the best ones... So much I didn't do, so much I could've done... My first crush, amazingly silly crush for one of the most popular girls in the school. Just by thinking of that I feel like slaming my head on a table as hard as I can.


this was highschool for me. I was in one troublesome school, with all the older troublesome kids. If I went to another, better school I think I might've turned out differently, who knows... I could turn out better than the freak I am today.


EDIT: Sorry for the long text, feel free to ignore it

 

[theblank]

I hated high school. The only thing I liked about it were the girls. I was a social outcast and sat alone in the lunch room. I'm still totally alone to this day.

 

[iamthenra]

I feared for my safety throughout all my school years from K - 12 ... I did my best to avoid bullies, but someone it was a daily task to avoid being beat up, and I do mean DAILY! Quite often I came home with blood soaked clothes, my own blood, black eye's, bloody nose, fat lips etc... Fearing for your life was HELL! Then I get home and I had to watch out for my mother who beat the crap out of me too. No place was safe for me... It seemed that nobody cared for me... The only difference now is that I am not getting beat up anymore. No girl friend, no good friends and no life.... Just taking up space and valuable water and air. Guess I was born to suffer, and suffer I shall until death takes me.::

 

[Shift]

High school wasn't too bad for me... Well, it was bad for a bit and my best friend forced me to get help for my SA and things were better after that.

Middle school was the absolute worst for me though. I had been miserable the whole time. It was a rich kid school, so people were snobby and jerks and I got bullied a lot for being quiet. Plus, I had teachers who treated me like I was mentally retarded (despite me being placed in a lot of advanced classes) because I didn't talk. I'm glad I moved far away from all that.

 

[Liberty]

I feared for my safety throughout all my school years from K - 12 ... I did my best to avoid bullies, but someone it was a daily task to avoid being beat up, and I do mean DAILY! Quite often I came home with blood soaked clothes, my own blood, black eye's, bloody nose, fat lips etc... Fearing for your life was HELL! Then I get home and I had to watch out for my mother who beat the crap out of me too. No place was safe for me... It seemed that nobody cared for me... The only difference now is that I am not getting beat up anymore. No girl friend, no good friends and no life.... Just taking up space and valuable water and air. Guess I was born to suffer, and suffer I shall until death takes me.::

Wow. That sounds terrible. Wouldn't your mother take pity on you for being abused in school?

This is why if I ever have kids, or a son especially, I will definitely teach him to fight and train for fighting. My son will never be bullied. I hated that feeling growing up. I was taught never to fight or stand up for myself and boy did it bite me in the ass.

 

[Richey]

it was pretty forgettable for the most part, i mean it had a reputation for being a bit tacky and it was a run down public school in terms of faciltities. i remember me being a bit of a dork in high school, i had this straight cut haircut and was a bit of a quiet goody two shoes i remember i would wear a cap everyday(what was i thinking?), but i didnt really know any better at the time. and i didnt have anyone really guiding me in terms of an influential friend or mentor. i was this kid who did what he was told and i kept to myself alot but i did have acquentances and a couple of friends, i dont remember learning alot from high school i mean the teaching was a bit poor in my opinion except in science where we had a teacher who viewed himself as equal to the students and he made it enjoyable, it was light-hearted but you learnt something at the same time. th other teachers were just "by-the-book" and uninspiring for me. alot of the students would gang up on other people and start fights, the school had that reputation. but in year 9 i remember we went overseas for a school trip which was the hilight of my high school existance.

yeh its definitely sad looking back at it. i mean i would have loved a normal high school life, making a ton of friends, girlfriends, go to parties and feel confident and it would have been nice to have the ability to not allow anxiety to get in the way of paying more attention to my surroundings.

high school can be a make or break for people but there are always chances to start again in the future but its nice to start earlier right?! yeh.

 

[DownInAHole]

Not horrible, but not great either... wasted potential....

 

[scarletlee]

Yes High School was hell for me, i left as soon as i turned 16. I didn't get bullied, for me it was just the classroom time that made me so anxious that a few times i would stumble out of the room and collapse in the corridor.
I had some good friends at this stage in my life but i couldn't cope with the constant nervous feeling i had when i was at school.

 

[shy17]

I am currently at high school. It is not a total hell for me, but it is really bad. I am pretty much depressed all the time, i am jealous because everybody around is brave, cool, got many friends, has got a great social life. People don't treat me like a freak, but they know i am different. I hate that i can't overcome my problems. I would like to be like them. The worst thing in high school is that everybody there has got something to say, and everybody has got their own friends (bunch of people who would spend time with him). Just not me. When i leave the school, the loneliness is eating me alive. I don't know why me , why the hell me

 

[SpLynx]

For me it wasnt because I was lucky to be in the dumbest class of the school so I was the most intelligent one in it. I was respected because they had a chance to get help from me. Though I still was having some insults from my "friends" about my weight or too long nose or something.. but overall it was ok. I was loved by all teachers.

 

[shy17]

Haha, about jokes about weight ... people often like to joke about my weight, i am almost eighteen years old and only 56 kg. While rest of society is muscular, strong and practicing sports, i am weak

 

[Krista]

It might have been the fact that I went to a small school but high school was never exceptionally bad for me aside from the people who made racist comments. Other than that I was pretty much friends with everyone and everyone knew me.