mum and dad

[Anonymous]

ok u have to choose one factor u think has contributed most, or kickstarted your sa. eg parents, bullies, siblings, and whatever other crrrrrrazy ideas u have sorry u dont have to but u know its something to do...turns the days to nights and all that

 

[dazz]

When my mum and dad split up, my SA really kicked in, i was about 8 years old at the time, im now 17 with no friends..

I woudnt really blame them for having SA though ..

 

[shep]

I believe a family situation can aggravate sp but I think the cause is a screw up in brain chemistry or balance. Maybe a situation can trigger it but I think that for the most part we have a little too much of this or too little of that. I had an older brother that was often putting me down instead of the protective type and that may have contributed, not sure. My self esteem took a beating. As for drug treatment, I believe it is a hit or miss proposition. The same drug seems to help some, have little or no effect on others, or work wonders. Sometimes they appear to be harmful.

 

[Chilling__Echo]

i simply have puberty to thank... and mom and dad... for the genes :wink:

 

[JWH]

If anything kickstarted it, it was a lack of independence caused by an overprotective mother. I was never bullied, had no siblings to learn from and no real awareness that I can think of. I didn't really "switch on" until I had to repeat a year of highschool in another school. While the change of schools did help, ultimately I still ended up with anxiety.

 

[Crimefish]

Lack of independence. But I don't know why my brother and sister turned out okay, as we had the same parents. I remember being SA since before I started school, anyway.

 

[Anonymous]

Overprotective mother. Parents split at ~10 years age.

 

[LilMissTragic]

Shyness as a child and SP kicked off when the bullying started

 

[Anonymous]

brain fuck-up.

dunno really, its just grown over time from perhaps small but significant things. e.g. breaking up with gf, changing jobs etc.

being shy to start off with has not been a help, but i do lie alot of it down to my upbringing.

 

[Anonymous]

always been shy but i have seriously over protective parents so i think thats part of it, along with having a genius brother. My mom i think might have mild sp, she has problems with phones and people in general, but she doesnt really let it stop her and she just calls it shyness...my dad pretends to be sociable but he has no idea about polite social interaction. he says what he thinks when he wants to.lol i think i have alot from them.

 

[Yossarian]

I really couldn't say....there's a few things maybe but nothing spectacular. If my environment has kicked off the SP I think it would be lots of smaller things than one specific thing.

 

[LA323]

genes, and lack of independence bcuz of my mum, she simply didnt give me a challenge in life, i had everything 2 easy and this made me weak and not ready 4 life, thats the thing i dont like my mum 4, mainly cuz i was the only child, it sux

 

[bluehands]

Isolation. I never really found out how to socialise with other kids

 

[missluiza]

dealing with cruel parents

My mother was definitely the main contributing factor of mine and my bro's problems, although I still love her(too soft) and try not to be bitter. She became quite twisted when we were teenagers and didn't let us out, constantly put us down, stopped talking to us apart from to analyze our bodies or something strange like that. She never invited anyone to our house, was always suspicious of everyone; either hated the few friends we had or told us how much better they were than us; forbid us from going to parties; would look us up and down when we walked into a room;played lots of head games; tried to play myself and my bro off against each other so we would have noone to confide in; never said 'I love you', 'I'm proud of you' etc; treated us like aliens when we hit puberty..I could carry on but I won't. Needless to say, there were a few gaps in her child-raising skills. Luckily, our dad is a beautiful person so we actually turned out to be very nice people despite all that (My dad was often abroad on business when we were little).
The only problem is that we both suffer from sp. I have made some great improvements in the last five years and one of the reasons this was possible was that I realized that resenting my mother and feeling bitter about things was only going to make me more angry and less at peace with myself. There is no justice in situations like these and very few parents will admit the bad things that they did in the past, so my advice would be to not let resentment and bitterness take over your life and accept what happened as part of your destiny.
Some of the most unhappy and unpleasant people I have met in my life are those who held deep grudges against parents for example. There is nothing you can do to change the past, so don't let cruel or hopeless parents destroy your present and future(fully aware that this is hard to do :wink:

 

[Yossarian]

I think that's really good advice missluiza. Holding on to negative feelings no matter how justified will only twist you up and prolong the damage and therefore any progress in the long run. Like you said it might not be easy.

Sometimes anger can be channelled in productive ways but long term I think it will only be bad for you.

 

[Hamble]

My mother for being emotionally weak, and extremely over protective, and having to live alone with her with no other influence to turn to. And also a couple of very bitchy girls at school who were hell bent on getting rid of my sunny nature. *rocks back and forth in corner dribbling and twitching* grrr *twitches some more*