hey guys,
im new here so ill introduce myself - my names james, im 21 and i live in wales.
ive been shy and quiet for my whole life but over time it just seems to be getting worse. when i was little i was ok-ish and then at school it got worse and now i feel like it just cant go any further.
i started uni about 4 weeks ago and im having a real problem making friends and whatever. the first week wasnt too bad cos everyone was the same, nobody knew each other and they were nervous too, although probably not as much as me. now though the others have got to know each other a bit and i still havent really made any friends. there are a few people ive talked to slightly but the conversation never goes very far, i just cant seem to go any further, i can never think of what to say, i just go blank.
i have no confidence in myself, i dont think im good looking or anything, im really image concious, and im always thinking of what people think of me, how they see me and whatever, so when i actually end up talking to anyone im still thinking the same and i go blank and i do panic a bit. it all leaves no room for me to think of things to say. and when i do say something my throat gets really dry, as if i havent drank anything for days, and i speak really quietly, to the point that they have to ask me to repeat what i said.
i do get slightly better when im with just a few people, its like im not the total center of attention when i say something. talking 1 on 1 is an absolute nightmare though cos then i am the center of attention, and more than 3 people gets really hard too cos then when you say something its like you have all these eyes burning a hole right through you.
ive been like this since i was born but it seems to be getting harder and i hate it all, its driving me mad. i feel like i cant go on. i hate the way i am. i just want to be able to talk to people. i suppose part of the reason its got worse is that ive just spent 2 years doing nothing. ive had bad health problems and its taken all the time to figure it all out, and in that time i havent been able to do anything, i even had to quit the last uni i attended cos of my health. 2 years of doing nothing, spending most days at home and not meeting anyone can really damage your confidence and mine was already worn away so much.
i just dunno what to do.
im new here so ill introduce myself - my names james, im 21 and i live in wales.
ive been shy and quiet for my whole life but over time it just seems to be getting worse. when i was little i was ok-ish and then at school it got worse and now i feel like it just cant go any further.
i started uni about 4 weeks ago and im having a real problem making friends and whatever. the first week wasnt too bad cos everyone was the same, nobody knew each other and they were nervous too, although probably not as much as me. now though the others have got to know each other a bit and i still havent really made any friends. there are a few people ive talked to slightly but the conversation never goes very far, i just cant seem to go any further, i can never think of what to say, i just go blank.
i have no confidence in myself, i dont think im good looking or anything, im really image concious, and im always thinking of what people think of me, how they see me and whatever, so when i actually end up talking to anyone im still thinking the same and i go blank and i do panic a bit. it all leaves no room for me to think of things to say. and when i do say something my throat gets really dry, as if i havent drank anything for days, and i speak really quietly, to the point that they have to ask me to repeat what i said.
i do get slightly better when im with just a few people, its like im not the total center of attention when i say something. talking 1 on 1 is an absolute nightmare though cos then i am the center of attention, and more than 3 people gets really hard too cos then when you say something its like you have all these eyes burning a hole right through you.
ive been like this since i was born but it seems to be getting harder and i hate it all, its driving me mad. i feel like i cant go on. i hate the way i am. i just want to be able to talk to people. i suppose part of the reason its got worse is that ive just spent 2 years doing nothing. ive had bad health problems and its taken all the time to figure it all out, and in that time i havent been able to do anything, i even had to quit the last uni i attended cos of my health. 2 years of doing nothing, spending most days at home and not meeting anyone can really damage your confidence and mine was already worn away so much.
i just dunno what to do.
