Anonymous
Well-known member
Hi every one,
I feel really terrible at the moment as about 12 years ago I met this really shy man who I liked because He was so shy and I've always been a quiet person myself though I woudln't say I had s/a. I feel all the thing syou guys have mentioned but I think every one must at some point.
Any how, whilst We were together, My BF did some really strange things to me like arranging to meet Me but once he drove past me and never showed. Whenever he did show, he'd always have to drive round the block about 2 or 3 times first and had to wash his hands the second he got in my house. He found it so hard to talk to Me and I'd even catch Him outside my house sometimes which to be honest, scared me a little. I really, really loved Him though and He was a really intelligent guy with this very impressive job. (classical musician)
People who knew Him said he was a total loner and never spoke to any one and then one day, He said he wanted a 3 month break and he'd explain everything except when the 3 months had past and I got in touch with Him, he said no matter how he looked ta it, it couldn't work and after that, He just blanked me.
I've never really got over it as it was the not knowing I guess and I've always being paranoid and blamed my self. Did I do something? But I got married and had a lovely little boy.
Because of the pregnancy, I got really bad pnd and suffered with anxiety, so I went on all these sites to read up on it and came across S/A and a guy with my ex BF's name. I delved a bit more and found out this man was teaching and he was writing to the forum because he was having to go back to school after an holiday and he was having panic attacks, he was so scared. It all suddenly made alot of sense to me but I couldn't be 100% sure it was the very same person but sounded too close none the less.
Oddly enough, I found My ex bf advertising for teaching work in November 2004 and rang Him on His mobile. he was more chatty than I'd ever known him before and seemed so confident so I thought oh that guy on that anxiety forum must have been coincidence.
My ex asked me lots of questions about my self and did seem pleased to hear from Me. he told Me to keep in touch and said he'd write and ring but it got to last week and I'd not heard from Him, so I rang Him and He was really nice to me again, a little guarded. He only talks about his work, nothing else but I was thinking about him alot at the weekend and searched FRIENDS REUNITED, here in England to see if he was on there and so he was. There was 3 schools listed, including a music school in London and his address at the time was the very same area the guy on the SA forum had put in his post so nothing's that coincidental but instead of letting it go, I emailed Him and asked Him, which was probs a terrible mistake as I don;t want him to feel bad. I just want Him to open up to Me and wanted Him to know if I'd known it never would have made a difference because like all the photos of people I've seen on Here, He was lovely!
I've tried to call but I just got his answer phone and now I don't know what to do. I really had hoped we could be friends and keep in touch but me wanting to get answers about what happened, might well have totally scared him off again and I just thought I'd ask you guys for your help. What do I do? what do I say? I'm also scared My self in case I'm so wrong about this and this guy's thinking THAT GIRL IS MAD! But I don't think I'm wrong.
I feel really terrible at the moment as about 12 years ago I met this really shy man who I liked because He was so shy and I've always been a quiet person myself though I woudln't say I had s/a. I feel all the thing syou guys have mentioned but I think every one must at some point.
Any how, whilst We were together, My BF did some really strange things to me like arranging to meet Me but once he drove past me and never showed. Whenever he did show, he'd always have to drive round the block about 2 or 3 times first and had to wash his hands the second he got in my house. He found it so hard to talk to Me and I'd even catch Him outside my house sometimes which to be honest, scared me a little. I really, really loved Him though and He was a really intelligent guy with this very impressive job. (classical musician)
People who knew Him said he was a total loner and never spoke to any one and then one day, He said he wanted a 3 month break and he'd explain everything except when the 3 months had past and I got in touch with Him, he said no matter how he looked ta it, it couldn't work and after that, He just blanked me.
I've never really got over it as it was the not knowing I guess and I've always being paranoid and blamed my self. Did I do something? But I got married and had a lovely little boy.
Because of the pregnancy, I got really bad pnd and suffered with anxiety, so I went on all these sites to read up on it and came across S/A and a guy with my ex BF's name. I delved a bit more and found out this man was teaching and he was writing to the forum because he was having to go back to school after an holiday and he was having panic attacks, he was so scared. It all suddenly made alot of sense to me but I couldn't be 100% sure it was the very same person but sounded too close none the less.
Oddly enough, I found My ex bf advertising for teaching work in November 2004 and rang Him on His mobile. he was more chatty than I'd ever known him before and seemed so confident so I thought oh that guy on that anxiety forum must have been coincidence.
My ex asked me lots of questions about my self and did seem pleased to hear from Me. he told Me to keep in touch and said he'd write and ring but it got to last week and I'd not heard from Him, so I rang Him and He was really nice to me again, a little guarded. He only talks about his work, nothing else but I was thinking about him alot at the weekend and searched FRIENDS REUNITED, here in England to see if he was on there and so he was. There was 3 schools listed, including a music school in London and his address at the time was the very same area the guy on the SA forum had put in his post so nothing's that coincidental but instead of letting it go, I emailed Him and asked Him, which was probs a terrible mistake as I don;t want him to feel bad. I just want Him to open up to Me and wanted Him to know if I'd known it never would have made a difference because like all the photos of people I've seen on Here, He was lovely!
I've tried to call but I just got his answer phone and now I don't know what to do. I really had hoped we could be friends and keep in touch but me wanting to get answers about what happened, might well have totally scared him off again and I just thought I'd ask you guys for your help. What do I do? what do I say? I'm also scared My self in case I'm so wrong about this and this guy's thinking THAT GIRL IS MAD! But I don't think I'm wrong.
