social phobia and university...AHHHH!!

[marmite]

I am in my second year at university and am struggling now more than ever. I clam up in seminars hoping I wont be asked to speak out. Ive got a presentation to do in May, and am considering leaving as I feel that bad.

I really want to graduate next year, but the pressure on me to 'perform' in front of people is really taking its toll!

Does anyone have any similar experiences or ways that theyve learnt to overcome this?

 

[Anonymous]

Hello Marmite,

Something very similar has happened to me. I graduated two years ago and like you gave my first presentation in my second year. I was really nervous and hated the idea. The way i got round it was to practice my presentation over and over. Use the same room as you'll be using in the real presentation and rehearse it over and over. Once you get to know the lecture theatre controls and environment you'll be alot more comfortable. It works for me.
I now lecture students twice a week for an hour and i still now and then quickly go through my material to make sure i dont umm and ahhh through my talk. If you know your material well you'll start to enjoy the lecture. The short time before the presentation you'll feel anxiety and maybe in the first few slides you have. Once you get into that same rythem as what you did when you practiced you'll feel better about yourself and the anxiety will pass.

If you want to know more about my anxiety and panic attacks at uni see my post:

http://www.socialphobiaworld.com/postt165.html&sid=685facc37397398afa2900e9711e6011

Don't worry about it. If you mess it up knowone will judge you for it. Everyone is in the same boat. Its aweful i know to see people with their heads held high and confident but sometimes these are the worst at their presentations.

Regards

 

[Orlando]

Hi, Marmite,

Yes, I understand your predicament. I’m in grad school. I have to do an hour presentation on Social Phobia on Monday, March 8, 2004 at 7pm. Yuck!
However, what keeps me a little calm is that I know most people will daydream through my presentation. I noticed that about myself (no matter how interesting the topic is!). My attention span lasts for the first 15 minutes after that I start thinking about other things (i.e., the breakfast I had in the morning, why I don’t like my toast burnt, if my sock are clean, etc).
So when I get up in front of my classmates, I will be blushing, sweating, and stumbling over my words BUT I know that after 15 minutes, they will be thinking about how they would like to eat their burnt socks in the morning. So I don’t care (even though, I do. Hey, I won’t lie to you. I’m nervous!) However, I’m just going to get this thing over and done with.

Just wanted to say. I know what you are going through and it is intimidating.

-I know that I will support you and many other people who use this website will support you too!-

Kick some Speech-‘butt”!

 

[neddy]

Marmite, I have never been able to stand up in front of people to give a talk/lecture, but some advice someone gave me one day was too make out that there was no one in room, or too fix your sight on something in the back of the room, even though every now and again you are susposed to look up at eveyone you aren't actually looking at them. Don't laugh but something else that was suggested was to imagine them sitting there in the nude, they are harmless and truth be known they are feeling as scared and nervous as you are. Some times when people come across as being really confident they are actually feeling anything but. Give it go, quite often if you make a mistake they wont pick up on it unless they are an expert on the subject.

 

[Orlando]

Marmite,

Are you feeling a little better about giving the speech?

 

[Orlando]

Marmite,

Are you feeling a little better about giving the speech?

 

[marmite]

Hi, thanks for the support..its much appreciated!

Unfortunately the thourght of giving a 20 min presentation to the class still scares the s!*t out of me! Ive seen my doc again and he has said he can give me valium for it if i want but im unsure about using medication for it! Has anyone had any experience with valium for public speaking before?

Ive only got two monthes of second year left so it'd be a shame to pack it in now just because of this obstacle... :roll:

 

[Orlando]

Hi, marmite!

Although I haven't used Valium, I used Xanax. Just 'watch-out' I heard people actually abuse the drug if they take it too long. But if you just use it for your speech and throw the bottle away, everything should be ok. Here is a website where you can get more information on valium.
http://www.psyweb.com/psywebsub/DrughtmAdv/AdvValium.html

As an alternative, you can consider Xanax. That is what I used (I stopped it though). It calmed me down in very anxious situations. It is used for short-term relief of mild to moderate anxiety and nervous tension. The generic name is Alprazolam. Here is a website that you could get some information on it. http://www.psyweb.com/Drughtm/xanax.html

Using it once to get over the speech, OK but anything after that "Watch-Out."

Good Luck!

 

[Mikey76]

Hello

Hi, I had the same problem as you. In class the proffesor called on me and i was just unable to speak. I dont know if it helps, but now i take my courses online. Its good to know that im still being productive in this state im in to set my self up good for the future, one that is hopefully free of SA.

 

[terresap]

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[symbiosis]

Hi there,

That's a really good suggestion terresap re handouts - keep the audience looking at bits of paper instead of the speaker!

Public speaking is hard...even for the majority of the population, let alone SPs..... I've always struggled with it, but get a HUGE feeling of accomplishment when I challenge myself in this area. I've also found practicing helps - if you know your stuff, you're less likely to stuff up!


Cheers, Helen

 

[sullen89]

Presentations are actually quite easy for social phobis once they realize that they are in control. Just know the material better than everyone else. Social phobia hits you much harder in the workforce when you have to be there at least 8 hrs per day. University is actually one of the easiest environments for shy people. The really shy neurotic types become the doctors in every subject. The neurosis actually makes you much better at studying and remembering when you are not around people or during tests.

 

[symbiosis]

Good point Sullen89 - SPs seem to a high achieving bunch, on the whole. It's like we can control our learning and are determined to be really good at it, even if we are "less than good" with the whole social thing!

Can be a problem though, I did two two uni psych topics last year and was determined to get >80% for everything, or why bother.....huge pressure and lousy impact on other aspects of life. Am now confused whether to continue uni study at all - ridiculous, hey??

 

[sickgirl]

Presentations

I am in my second year of university also, this year i had to give too presentations. At the beginning of the year i found this out and i was terrified, i didn't that i would be able to do it. But the first presentation was a group one and i only ended out talking for about 10min so it wasn't too bad. I made myself cue cards a week before and practiced over an over. First by myself, i recorded it on my computer with my mic. I kept doing it till i was satified with how it sounded. Then i practiced a few times infront of my family members to boost my confidience. Then before the presentation i practice infront of close friends and finally met with my group and did a run through an hour before. By the time i gave the speech i was like a robot, i got through it with out mistakes but i did the whole thing monitone. But i realized that when i was waiting to do my presentation i was not paying attention to anyone elses, then after i still was not paying attention. I was so relieved, i was thinking of what i was going to have for dinner, or what i was going to do later on. It helps to realize that most people don't even care what you are saying in class presentations, they all are nervous and have other things on there minds.
It actually felt really good right after it was over, i kinda liked the rush.

About a month later i had to give a presentation to my class, but this time it was independant. It had to be 20min long, I did not think that it was possible for me to talk about something for 20 whole minutes. My presentation was on Human Cloning. The worst part was there was no time to prepare. It was right by exams so i only had a weekend to research the topic, write a 15 page paper on it, and then make a powerpoint presentation and practice it. The paper took 2 days, so i only hade sunday for the presentation but it was amazing how well i could do under pressure. I think because of all the extra stress it took my mind off worrying about the presentation. I worked so hard on the paper, and I made sure that the presentation only contained the interesting parts of it. This way i would not forget what i was saying because it was something that i enjoyed thinking about. Keep it simple so that everyone can follow, then they will not have any difficult questions to ask. Also figure out what interests you about the topic and try practicing discussing it with people you are comfortable with.

Good luck to anyone in this situation!

 

[marmite]

Hey,

Wow..thanks for all the support, theres alot of good tips there that I shall try and use somehow.

Someone asked 'what is it specifically that worries me about the speech'..suppose mainly its the fear that i might blush. This is something that has crippled me over the years, and have found that i blush very easily, particularly when doing presentations. I have managed to deal with them before, but they were in groups, so the pressure was less intense. But the thourght of having to do this on my own next month is really eating away at me.

I have decided I will use the valium, but am also having some 'suggestion therapy' from my hypnotherapist before hand.

Marmite

 

[Anonymous]

hey maybe try something natural too,bach remedies are really good i hear, you can get ones specifically for confidence building.may be worth a try? a friend of mine used to have panic attacks and she took the rescue remedy and it really helped her. I hate giving presentations and like you i have a small time left in my second year,but when i think im not sure if i can do this anymore i think how annoyed with myself i'll be and how good i'll feel when i've completed my degree. you've done so well to get this far soooo many people dont even last one semester! also i definately agree about people not really listening to whats said in presentations, they just switch off or are too worried about their own to focus on what else is going on.and they're all in the same situation so they'll understand how nerve racking it is. and how important are they in comparison to the rest of you're future?! you can do it,

 

[Anonymous]

Heh I just found this site and I've found a topic ready made for me.


I find being at university makes me feel extremely anxious.I get so fearful of embaressment and ridicule almost everywhere in my university.I cannot sit in a lecture theatre without feeling somebody is watching and judging me.I have to sit alone if I can, otherwise will become agitated.I feel people don't forget stupid incidents or accidents and strive to avoid contact wwith them,since I believe they will remember what I have done.

I never try to go anywhere in the campus where lots of people are.It just makes me nervous.I have to find a seluded work space in the library.I cannot go into large crowded computer labs either ,again fear overules.

 

[Anonymous]

speech

I would recommend a beta blocker like propanolol as being better than a tranquillizer as it just deals with the physical symptoms of fear like sweating (and blushing) but doesn't knock you out mentally. I've tried both and I much prefer a Beta blocker - try it before the talk

 

[terresap]

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[Anonymous]

seminar anxiety please help

I was wondering if anybody else is having the same problems as me.I am so glad that I have found this website as I have been looking for somebody to help in for ages.
The problem for me is, any way in which i have to talk out in front of anyone, especially if I am called upon in a seminar by a lecturer for any reason at all I cant handle the thought of it never mind doing it.
I am just about to start my second year at my degree, during my first year i couldnt go to the seminars because of this fear so i just attended the lectures and past the year.
Now that im about to start year two I know that i need to go to these seminars but i am so scared that im afraid im going to fail or drop out even though i so want to finish this degree badly, I am trying to convince myself that I will be able to go even though deep down i know i cant. Even so, if i do the same as i did last year, will i get wrong for doing this? Or will I be able to pass again like i did last year!
This is such a fear i dont know what to do, and i was wondering if anybody else has got this same fear as me, or has had it before and knows what to do if they have succeeded in getting over it.

If any one has any advice i would really appreciate it, i am really distaught. I have even seen a hypnotherapist to try and hypnotise me for more confidence, but it didnt work.

Please if someone knows of any help. Thanks