Telling people about SP

[Doomed2Die]

A very interesting thing happened to me not long ago, I simply decided to ignore those screaming thoughts and tell and explain why I didnt go visit/talk more/chat to friends and family. While I hate explaining it, it helped loads, people understood me much more than they did before and those that I thought would abandon me helped me out.

I felt terrible after, so insecure and worried that I have lost those few people I know, but really it is the best way to go. Accepting it but not overblowing it, tell others because it defines how we will act in most social encounters, and can explain many things without too many words. Accept it and fight it by telling others.

As for ranting on at someone I gather thats a bad thing to do, even though I SO want to :S. I'll probally see a psychiatrist or something for the heavy stuff.

Obviously no need to tell everyone, but those who you feel are friends and family. Even if they take it lightly make sure they don't, it IS serious.

So, post your stories ^^ and hopefully we can all learn from them one way or another.

 

[LaLaLa]

I'm happy for you that those around you understand. I still can't quite get people to really get this in their heads. They think I'm just going through some phase and that I'd grow out of it... what? :evil: or maybe they're really just saying that cause they think it would actually make me feel a slight bit better? So far, everybody who knows about this gives me the same advices. I know, they really do want to help but I guess it might be a little hard for them to accept that I'm not mentally normal, so they're just seeing this as something that's not unusual and trying to tell me that its not hard, when it really is. They don't realise how severe my phobia is. I can't just force myself to act my age or just get out more.

 

[rado31]

I'm happy for you that those around you understand. I still can't quite get people to really get this in their heads. They think I'm just going through some phase and that I'd grow out of it... what? :evil: or maybe they're really just saying that cause they think it would actually make me feel a slight bit better? So far, everybody who knows about this gives me the same advices. I know, they really do want to help but I guess it might be a little hard for them to accept that I'm not mentally normal, so they're just seeing this as something that's not unusual and trying to tell me that its not hard, when it really is. They don't realise how severe my phobia is. I can't just force myself to act my age or just get out more.

Frankly, i think it is not wise to talk about it. Sp isnt a mental condition as usual, mental issues come as a result of Sp. You are physically sensitive and therefore emotionaly sensitive. People can maybe emphatize with you but they surely cannot understand.

If they could hypothetically understand the condition, neverthless they wouldnt care.

 

[Butterflies]

I congratulate you on the courage it must have taken for you to speak with friends and family ... I know I wouldn't do it. I've kept social phobia to myself until I started overcomming it - and even then I only talk about it very selectively.

I'd be interested to hear how telling them about how you feel affects the way they perceive and treat you.

Also - how it affects the way you deal with them.

 

[JBI]

I told a guy at school whom I met over the summer on the internet. We'd share feelings with each other over the few months; I even got the courage to send him a long email telling him how much I liked him, and what a difference he was making in my life. Apparently I made his day with that email. (But it's not like we hooked up or anything.) Anyhoo, I finally think I hit rock bottom and I just wanted to live in my hole and not talk to him out of fear of emotionally hurting him. I sent him another email telling him that "I was going away for awhile." He asked me what I meant, and so I just sent him a long email explaining everything. I laid out all my cards on the table, and let him know every negative aspect of my life. Well, I was expecting him to run away, but he didn't. He sent me a long inspirational email that's really helping me, and he been pretty supportive.

It's too bad I can't seem to get the courage to really talk to him in class. We have some of the most deep email conversations though. I feel like I can talk to him about anything. It'd be nice to know how he feels about me, but I'm a patient person, and it's not like I'm turning down offers while I wait. I should be back to normal by Christmas, (^_^), and I'll how things play out after that. Anyone who can go through a mental illness with someone is definitely a keeper. :wink:

 

[Generical]

Ive told a few people lately and this is only becuase im getting over it now.......kinda. When i had it badly i didnt even know it was a disorder i just thought it was me so i never really could talk about it as i had no info, i just couldnt explain it, although my parents knew i had problems so they helped by making me do things and go out, which was hard but yeah it helped. Now i know what i am suffering from i try to tell people and they assume that im totally over it or think im overreacting or something. Its just hard to explain and i dont think people realise how demoralizing and depressing it can be.

But i guess if i was in their shoes i wouldnt have a clue what to say, probably my mind would go blank and ramble on saying 'your fine'. I really do want to tell all of my friends but i cant just randomly spring it up into conversation and its not usual that my friends discuss their problems. Plus i think i sometimes put a front on and they dont think im the most sensitive of people or easy to talk to.........eurgh i dunno

 

[alter_ego]

I tried explaining to people I worked with that I was socially phobic to explain why I never wanted to go to the pub with them lunchtimes (I did a handful of times but I hated it) but they just don't get it - they think it means I have a phobia of crowded places and misguidedly suggest solutions that just aren't solutions like "We'll sit near the door in case you feel bad" :roll:

Well, how can I be entirely honest with them and tell them there are at least two people in the group who make me feel extremely uncomfortable because they're always bitching about everyone? And that sometimes people they know but I don't (*major unease with strangers*) join us, which makes my anxiety worse. There ARE two people in the office I like a lot and can talk to with ease, but I don't feel too relaxed with the rest.

In the end it's easier to let them think I have a phobia of crowded places because they accept that and even try to understand it whereas social phobia... *sigh* :roll:

 

[Allan]

Well, I told my mum how i've been feeling about myself and everyone else for a while, and to my surprise, she told me that she felt the same way around the time I was born. She couldn't even go to the shops to get the groceries, it was that bad. Weird, eh?

Guess I know where I get it from...