Hi Maggie
I've posted this elsewhere but it was a long time ago and there are a lot of threads here.
One really useful thing was the following book.
I bought it online at Amazon so I didn't have to face anyone in the process. I am now working through the exercises in it. Using this approach, you don't have to tell anyone - although the first thing you should work towards should be asking for help I think.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/A...79/sr=2-1/ref=pd_ka_b_2_1/102-6631545-2756927
In case the link doesn't work - look up the author Gillian Butler on Amazon and that will get you to the book.
I love reading and working out problems in my head. So basically doing CBT on my own has worked quite well for me so far (kind of like a complicated cryptic crossword). I see a psychologist every few weeks but she is really just backing up what I am mostly doing on my own. A book is a great place to start for many people with social phobia I think.
That doesn't mean I don't recommend getting help from a doctor, but perhaps you can use the book to remind yourself that it is ok to go and ask a doctor for help.
Don't feel like a freak Maggie. I felt like a freak for most of my life, but we are all different and all good at some things and find others hard. One of the best things I ever learned was that I'm not a freak. I'm nowhere near average sure, but that doesn't mean that I am less of a worthwhile person. Normality is WAY overrated.
It's hard for me to explain just how positive I feel at the moment, but I have really improved over the last 5 months. Over my life I have had anxiety problems come and go, but it was like I had no control, I couldn't stop the problems developing and IF they went (because not all did) it seemed to be just sheer luck.
Now, I have taken some control over my fear. Some control only, I still have a problem, but it isn't running my life like it was even 6 months ago.