Hey guys, new here. 25, female, Canadian living in New Zealand.
I would say I enjoy being alone, yet sometimes I feel lonely. I am happiest hanging out with just my partner/boyfriend but he is more social than I am and likes to go out together with others.
I find when we go out I get very anxious. If we are at a bar or a restaurant and sitting at a table having a conversation, if I can hear someone else's conversation then I totally lose concentration on the person who is talking to me. The same goes if new people walk in or walk by the window, I find myself immediately distracted by this (non-important event) and lose concentration on my own conversations. The darkness/ dim lighting in bars also gives me some sort of anxiety for some reason.
I seem to enjoy one on one encounters where I almost feel pressure to talk to a person but as soon as I other person joins us then I find myself left out of the conversation and wondering how others can carry on a conversation so easily. Sometimes I resent them for making me feel left out. But I don't think it's their problem. It must be something I am doing that signals to them that I am uncomfortable.
I often monitor the way people socialize and their body language/eye contact etc. I feel like I can't figure it out. If I am talking to someone I feel weird looking at them straight in the eye too long and find myself talking forward, and not directly at them.
Anyway, I don't know where I'm doing with this. I don't know if I suffer from social anxiety, or just anxiety in general, or low self esteem. Does anyone relate to any of these examples? Anything I can do to work on them?
Cheers guys
I would say I enjoy being alone, yet sometimes I feel lonely. I am happiest hanging out with just my partner/boyfriend but he is more social than I am and likes to go out together with others.
I find when we go out I get very anxious. If we are at a bar or a restaurant and sitting at a table having a conversation, if I can hear someone else's conversation then I totally lose concentration on the person who is talking to me. The same goes if new people walk in or walk by the window, I find myself immediately distracted by this (non-important event) and lose concentration on my own conversations. The darkness/ dim lighting in bars also gives me some sort of anxiety for some reason.
I seem to enjoy one on one encounters where I almost feel pressure to talk to a person but as soon as I other person joins us then I find myself left out of the conversation and wondering how others can carry on a conversation so easily. Sometimes I resent them for making me feel left out. But I don't think it's their problem. It must be something I am doing that signals to them that I am uncomfortable.
I often monitor the way people socialize and their body language/eye contact etc. I feel like I can't figure it out. If I am talking to someone I feel weird looking at them straight in the eye too long and find myself talking forward, and not directly at them.
Anyway, I don't know where I'm doing with this. I don't know if I suffer from social anxiety, or just anxiety in general, or low self esteem. Does anyone relate to any of these examples? Anything I can do to work on them?
Cheers guys