ShyChild
Active member
I'm so tired of trying to fight this. It feels like there is just no way out & this is how it's always going to be. Since my early teens, I've done everything to get better- meds, therapy, rehab, yoga, you name it. Sometime I feel better & it seems like I'm progressing then BAM right back to where I started.
I still don't have any friends yet, but I'm much farther along than I used to be. Once upon a time I couldn't come out of the house, & I certainly wouldn't have bothered posting this. Having just started my first semester in grad school I know I've come a long way. I just feel myself withdrawing again & slipping back into old behaviors. One of my biggest issues is the bitterness & resentment I feel towards others.
Today I found out someone I used to go to school with (who is undergoing radiation for cancer) is getting married & all I felt about it was jealousy & later in the day anger about how I'm all alone. Anybody else struggle with these sorts of feelings? It really does worry me that I've become this antisocial. I want to feel better & to be a better person, but how?
I still don't have any friends yet, but I'm much farther along than I used to be. Once upon a time I couldn't come out of the house, & I certainly wouldn't have bothered posting this. Having just started my first semester in grad school I know I've come a long way. I just feel myself withdrawing again & slipping back into old behaviors. One of my biggest issues is the bitterness & resentment I feel towards others.
Today I found out someone I used to go to school with (who is undergoing radiation for cancer) is getting married & all I felt about it was jealousy & later in the day anger about how I'm all alone. Anybody else struggle with these sorts of feelings? It really does worry me that I've become this antisocial. I want to feel better & to be a better person, but how?