ImNotMyIllness
Well-known member
Here's a MAJOR BONUS. If you add just 2-4 servings (total) of fruits and vegetables a day, you'll have LESS room for junk food!
Wanting too much out of life
- Thread starter ImNotMyIllness
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Here's a MAJOR BONUS. If you add just 2-4 servings (total) of fruits and vegetables a day, you'll have LESS room for junk food!
MikeyC
Well-known member
Believe me...that doesn't work for me.
h:EDIT: I feel we're getting away from the original point of your achievements, anyway! I think you're doing really well and definitely keep it up.
ImNotMyIllness
Well-known member
Believe me...that doesn't work for me.
Ha! Then add more! I just don't buy that kind of stuff. Now, when I go over to my sisters, then it's temptation city. If you don't have it around, you won't eat it.
Kiwong
Well-known member
I walk a tight rope between a nightmare and a dream. I can go from despair to happiness sometimes in the one afternoon. In the last five years I've gone from absolute zero to doing many of the things I dreamed. And I am not a very positive person.
And this all happened because I reached an absolute low point of ill health and despair, and I was forced to fight to survive. I discovered my unconquerable soul.
It's been a time of things happening that feel like almost miracles. Beating panic disorder, fighting knee pain and winning, and by some miracle being able to run again after twenty years. I never dreamed I would run again I only wanted to walk without pain! 2008- was the best year of my life when I returned to running and discovered true happiness, I lived it. To have lived a time like that is probably lucky, worth being born in the first place. I have run two marathons, this is something I never believed would happen. I am taking landscape photos and really feeling a wonder in discovery of the amazing detail in the natural world, it's been a time of discovery.
In many ways this last 5 years has been my time to live, and I am thankful. But living with anxiety is hard and many of the memories of this time when I have tried to live are soured by - fear. It gets too hard and I want to give up and just hide away somewhere.
I feel like I am riding the crest of huge nightmare and fear I will be wiped out again. I've seen the darkness, and I am terrified of going back there again. Lately, I think I just want an end to the intensity, I just want to feel at peace, not happy or sad or fearful.
I try to turn my powerful mind towards the dream, and take small steps towards it, with no guarantee of success. I have found that if my mind focusses on something good or bad then my actions will lead to an inevitable outcome. The mind is powerful. I want to try and turn my mind more towards the dream and away from the nightmare.
And this all happened because I reached an absolute low point of ill health and despair, and I was forced to fight to survive. I discovered my unconquerable soul.
It's been a time of things happening that feel like almost miracles. Beating panic disorder, fighting knee pain and winning, and by some miracle being able to run again after twenty years. I never dreamed I would run again I only wanted to walk without pain! 2008- was the best year of my life when I returned to running and discovered true happiness, I lived it. To have lived a time like that is probably lucky, worth being born in the first place. I have run two marathons, this is something I never believed would happen. I am taking landscape photos and really feeling a wonder in discovery of the amazing detail in the natural world, it's been a time of discovery.
In many ways this last 5 years has been my time to live, and I am thankful. But living with anxiety is hard and many of the memories of this time when I have tried to live are soured by - fear. It gets too hard and I want to give up and just hide away somewhere.
I feel like I am riding the crest of huge nightmare and fear I will be wiped out again. I've seen the darkness, and I am terrified of going back there again. Lately, I think I just want an end to the intensity, I just want to feel at peace, not happy or sad or fearful.
I try to turn my powerful mind towards the dream, and take small steps towards it, with no guarantee of success. I have found that if my mind focusses on something good or bad then my actions will lead to an inevitable outcome. The mind is powerful. I want to try and turn my mind more towards the dream and away from the nightmare.
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ImNotMyIllness
Well-known member
Very inspiring. Fear has been my biggest enemy. When I run from it, it only gets bigger. Each day, becoming more and more unmanageable.
When I stop giving into fear and worry, I feel like I'm at peace. The past is the past, no sense on dwelling about it (other than for the lessons it provides). And, no sense worrying about the future. That will not change anything for the better, not to mention I'm wasting away the present.
What's real, what matters, is NOW. I see my mental illness as challenges to overcome and a path for greater self discovery.
Kiwong
Well-known member
Facing fear is hard. That is what we face to try to live. I keep telling myself to not give up on that battle, but it is easier said than done.
ImNotMyIllness
Well-known member
You're right. It's hard. Sometimes you fail....and you know what? It's okay to fail. That's part of being human, we all fail. As long as you try. I think we sometimes inflict more damage on ourselves by beating our self up for failing than the actual failure. Kicking yourself when your down makes getting back up so much harder.
Failure is a part of life. I need to remind myself to embrace it more. Instead of seeing it as an attack on my "self"(ego) or self worth.
S_Spartan
Well-known member
I agree but it has been my experience that these days love comes with a list of demands. Good post, btw.
Well the Buddha already said something to the accord of "To want is to suffer".
I think it's partly true, because wanting something, like some vague ambition puts an incredible pressure on the soul. The here and now, and who we are, isn't good enough, we must strive towards some point in the future, only then can we be happy. This also creates a lot of fear, because we put everything in it, and this creates also a feeding ground for procrastinating. We build up a lot of nervous tension around our goals.
I think doing is very important, not focussing so much on the outcome but on the doing itself. But with mental problems it can be hard to consistently work at stuff like careers and projects. I myself notice that I have a hard time getting out of the "slump", and this has a lot to do with depression, the brain chemicals that give me a tired and burnt out feeling.
Keep working on your dreams, and don't forget to focus your attention on the here and now too.
I think it's partly true, because wanting something, like some vague ambition puts an incredible pressure on the soul. The here and now, and who we are, isn't good enough, we must strive towards some point in the future, only then can we be happy. This also creates a lot of fear, because we put everything in it, and this creates also a feeding ground for procrastinating. We build up a lot of nervous tension around our goals.
I think doing is very important, not focussing so much on the outcome but on the doing itself. But with mental problems it can be hard to consistently work at stuff like careers and projects. I myself notice that I have a hard time getting out of the "slump", and this has a lot to do with depression, the brain chemicals that give me a tired and burnt out feeling.
Keep working on your dreams, and don't forget to focus your attention on the here and now too.
Froggy246
Well-known member
Brilliant thread!
I've been wondering if there's any point going on, because it really seems like I'm never going to be a 'success' or improve my life. And I think my symptoms of low self esteem was perhaps a result of big expectations, perhaps wanting to attain greatness, or even I'm very ashamed to admit , thinking I had the potential for it, and then suffering for falling short.
However I am starting to realise what the important pursuits are, and I agree that cultivation of the Now is key because that's the only place we will ever live.
The ego will never be satisfied, so it's kind of a pointless pursuit. Like the mirage in the desert.
So yea anyways I agree with a lot of what's written in this thread! And a couple of resources came to mind when I was reading through all the posts.
First relating to motivation changing food consumption, I find watching documentaries like Food Matters, gets me in the right mindset to get back on track. I really want to see if a less intoxicated and nutrient rich body will have an effect on my mood, I know it will but I'm interested to see to what degree.
I've also been reading The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking. It's pretty thought provoking....
I've been wondering if there's any point going on, because it really seems like I'm never going to be a 'success' or improve my life. And I think my symptoms of low self esteem was perhaps a result of big expectations, perhaps wanting to attain greatness, or even I'm very ashamed to admit , thinking I had the potential for it, and then suffering for falling short.
However I am starting to realise what the important pursuits are, and I agree that cultivation of the Now is key because that's the only place we will ever live.
The ego will never be satisfied, so it's kind of a pointless pursuit. Like the mirage in the desert.
So yea anyways I agree with a lot of what's written in this thread! And a couple of resources came to mind when I was reading through all the posts.
First relating to motivation changing food consumption, I find watching documentaries like Food Matters, gets me in the right mindset to get back on track. I really want to see if a less intoxicated and nutrient rich body will have an effect on my mood, I know it will but I'm interested to see to what degree.
I've also been reading The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking. It's pretty thought provoking....
ImNotMyIllness
Well-known member
Great points! Also, failure can be a good thing. It provides (if you allow it) a deeper and richer understanding into yourself. Failure is a time to look within and recalibrate. In the meantime, I'm trying to look for all of the positives in life and be grateful.
Falkor
1
I know what you mean by wanting too much out of life. And your urge of wanting so much, is BECAUSE you are stuck because of SA. It starts to build up more and more the longer you're at home. If school or a job doesn't work out, do something else, find something to focus on, it's very hard but once you get to something, you will see it's worth it.
I have the same issue. I'm at home. Dropped out at school because of a suicidal phase, nor ever had a job.
Now I have simple goals, like: I play rocksmith everyday on my ps3, to learn guitar. i go to singing lesson once a week, and that's all. I hate that my world is so small, but one or two or three goals can already make it a bit more enjoyable. so find yourself goals, even if they are small, it will get bigger.
and a plan, is very important to get more out of life. write it down.
I have the same issue. I'm at home. Dropped out at school because of a suicidal phase, nor ever had a job.
Now I have simple goals, like: I play rocksmith everyday on my ps3, to learn guitar. i go to singing lesson once a week, and that's all. I hate that my world is so small, but one or two or three goals can already make it a bit more enjoyable. so find yourself goals, even if they are small, it will get bigger.
and a plan, is very important to get more out of life. write it down.
ImNotMyIllness
Well-known member
I know what you mean by wanting too much out of life. And your urge of wanting so much, is BECAUSE you are stuck because of SA. It starts to build up more and more the longer you're at home. If school or a job doesn't work out, do something else, find something to focus on, it's very hard but once you get to something, you will see it's worth it.
I have the same issue. I'm at home. Dropped out at school because of a suicidal phase, nor ever had a job.
Now I have simple goals, like: I play rocksmith everyday on my ps3, to learn guitar. i go to singing lesson once a week, and that's all. I hate that my world is so small, but one or two or three goals can already make it a bit more enjoyable. so find yourself goals, even if they are small, it will get bigger.
and a plan, is very important to get more out of life. write it down.
I think it's good to have goals, even small ones. But, it's also important to get to the root cause of our anxieties. Some of which are neurological. But also by dealing with the underlying psychological issues we can have a more full life.
I think many of us have problems liking ourselves. We assume others disapprove or don't like us either. This inevitably creates anxiety and in turn fear. (who wants to see people that don't like them?!)
So, liking yourself is key. There may be a few here that have a high self esteem yet suffer from SA. That is because they believe there is a mismatch as to their ideal of themselves and how they perceive others view them, which is lower than the "idea self" they see themselves as.
springk
Well-known member
wow..i am not sure if i can say if i want too much out of life. Umm yeah there was a phase when i had fictional crushes( it was adolescence), had dreams of going abroad for studies, etc ....then something happened with my brain or with me and i never moved out of my home. Now 26 and have no career, and no hope of love either. I don't want much but this is certainly the worse time ever and i don't want this to last but i have no hopes.
sorry i turned this into my story .You are doing great INM..keep up the good work. You are a lovely person.
sorry i turned this into my story .You are doing great INM..keep up the good work. You are a lovely person.
dannyboy65
Well-known member
Well something I learned in school this year was Maslow's hierarchy of needs I don't know if you are familiar but the list says all of the things a person needs to be successful. Step one is physiological such as food, water, warmth and rest. In order to move up on the scale you need that first once you acquire that you go to safety needs such as security and the feeling of safety. Above that is belongingness and love needs this is where you have your family, intimate relationships and friendships. That is where I am currently at. Above that is the Esteem needs where you feel accomplished. This stage is hard to get to and then the last stage is rarely met by people it is called the self-actualization stage it means you have achieved all of your goals and you went and did your full potential. People that met or do meet that would be people like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, or maybe Albert Einstein. What I'm trying to say is its good your thankful and remember not everyone gets to be out on top. It is good to set goals but first create smaller goals, for example. I am a college student taking a course to learn more about myself and how I can better succeed. Recently I have decided I want to take fundamental arts and be an artist. That is a short term goal, my long term goal is wanting to be married one day and have a happy life. I hope I helped and best of luck to you
ImNotMyIllness
Well-known member
Well something I learned in school this year was Maslow's hierarchy of needs I don't know if you are familiar but the list says all of the things a person needs to be successful. Step one is physiological such as food, water, warmth and rest. In order to move up on the scale you need that first once you acquire that you go to safety needs such as security and the feeling of safety. Above that is belongingness and love needs this is where you have your family, intimate relationships and friendships. That is where I am currently at. Above that is the Esteem needs where you feel accomplished. This stage is hard to get to and then the last stage is rarely met by people it is called the self-actualization stage it means you have achieved all of your goals and you went and did your full potential. People that met or do meet that would be people like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, or maybe Albert Einstein. What I'm trying to say is its good your thankful and remember not everyone gets to be out on top. It is good to set goals but first create smaller goals, for example. I am a college student taking a course to learn more about myself and how I can better succeed. Recently I have decided I want to take fundamental arts and be an artist. That is a short term goal, my long term goal is wanting to be married one day and have a happy life. I hope I helped and best of luck to you
Thanks DannyBoy. I agree with Maslow's list. I think we can sometimes confuse popularity, materialism etc with self actualization. I too have artistic aspirations and would also like to get married. I hope to be self-actualized one day.
ImNotMyIllness
Well-known member
*.....It's been a while since I studied Maslow. I never really thought about it. At the time it made sense. But now, looking at it again, I don't think it's so simple. Although I do think Self Actualization belongs on top, some other levels blur into one another. Also the hierarchy doesn't include Mental Health, which adds another dimension. This topic would make a great thread.