wot next ???

[nici]

well, had to go back to my docs today to get a top up on the diazepam he prescribed last mth, which I took as a last resort and has helped a bit, but not quite found the dosage suited for me. The only problem was he flatly refused to give it out again, said it was a temporary measure and he doesnt want me on it anymore. So wot was the point of letting me try out being more relaxed for a while just to take it away from me again. dont get me wrong, my Gp is a brilliant guy who has been dealing with me for over a year now and I have my total trust in him. Anyway after plenty blubbering and begging he gave in and only prescibed it as long as i go back to see therapist for more CBT, which I agreed even though I dont feel strong enough to deal with my problems in this way yet. The trouble is Im scared stiff now cos I know when I go back to docs in a mth I wont be getting more diazepam and I'll be back to the nervous wreck I was. Where do I go from here, The only way I can see out of this at the moment is with strong medication. I also take anti-depressants and propranalol. Isnt life on meds better than no life at all !!!

 

[oszapo]

Hello nici,i read your other posts as well and first i like to say that i think its nice to know that you not alone with this.i have exactly the same.There are certain people who can make blush just as they say hello.
one is a manager at my place and i noticed how badly people are lookin at me when this happens im sure they think i fancy him.
I also go red every time a sit at a dinner table and my dad starts talkin to me.I go red if i have to walk up to someone and they are watchin me.I go red if i have to do something and someone is watchin.I go red when im at the till payin for sg.,seein someone at the supermarket..
Im a very bad case and its absolutely horrible when i go red and my work mate looks around straight away who came in why i gone red so that makes it worse.
But anyway i wanted to tell with all this that still i dont think its the end of the world if you dont take strong meds.
I went to the doctor and he gave me propranalol 40 mg thats all i take and only if im goin to like a family meet.So far i took it twice.
Did you not try make up?I work nights so i look very stupid goin in with loads of make up in a factory but still i always use some powder-even i know everyone knows whi i wear it to hide my .
when im out with my boyfriend i look like a barbie doll and make sure i consume some alcohol so i get less nervous.This doesn happen all the time im not an alcoholi!But sometimes it helps.
So i would say try get rid off your meds and try herbal insted did you try any?And keep the strong ones only for the big event when you know gonna blush a lot.

 

[nici]

Found it interesting when you said you blush at the most trivial of things, like your dad talking to you. I find i blush the most in front of my dad and other certain people who i feel like im become phobic too. Yet im fine with others. Dont like personal questions like 'you remind me of someone' or 'your face is very familiar'. Theyre my worst, they put the fear of god into me, and i start to shake, blush etc immediately.
I take anti-depressants daily, havent found one suited yet. take propranalol when I know I'll be in company and save diazepam for work, meetings etc.
I wish I didnt have to rely on them but seems no answer at the moment.
Ordered some Kava Kava off the net which Ive heard can be good, but still not sure if its allowed with anti depressants.
I do wear make up, trying out NO 7 green makeup at the moment, but because theres never a mirror in front of you when your talking to someone, I havent got any idea if its working!
Thanks for your replies, Us depressives need a moan now and then (well, nearly always) and unfortunately 'normal' people just dont want to know !!!!