I'm always curious to know more of what it's like for guys with SA. Of course, to be a male with confidence and financial deficits in present-day culture is brutal. But I think it's improving with the recent attention given to personality types and introversion vs. extroversion. I see that shy males are still struggling, but more often they're seen as "sensitive" and pensive.
Heck, I even wonder if ADD is getting a better rep lately. Last month, I told a co-worker I was (not have) ADD, and she congratulated me, claiming people with ADD are actually gifted in ways others strive to be. Verdict is still out on that one, but I admit I appreciated her response. Similarly, a small bit of the negative associations with SA in males sometimes translates more positively than in the past. Like myself, it seems like more women nowadays seek the qualities of a more thoughtful, gentle and quiet male than the over-the-top personality of previous generations.
But what I don't see is the same shift happening for women. If it's true that art imitates life, then my observation must not be too far off. Look at what society currently portrays as the ideal woman. Usually, it's a woman who is "killing it" - very outspoken, take charge, competitive, fearless and, sometimes, shameless. For those like myself who fall on the opposite end of that spectrum, things get real hard, real fast. As a shy introvert with confidence issues, I can't tell you how many times a so-called alpha male loses interest in me when the topic of social anxiety comes up. Just as evidence of it surfaces, suddenly I go from being a "special woman" to just "special" and flawed, no longer a worthy candidate. It's rude and heartbreaking; but mostly it's a shame because I'm the kind of woman who, if the tables were turned, would become more interested him and want to get to know him more intimately. This actually happened with someone I met years ago. We talked openly about our SA and grew very close despite it, discovering there was much more to us than our deficits.