no1
Banned
I found it easier to talk to women cos they tried to understand... they were more forgiving...I have this knack of being too careful when i talk...I am nervous that i might slip... i try to be perfect... and usually i end up being silly... Guys see right through it and taunt me with their expressions... i feel heartbroken, cos i was so careful and still i slipped and got ridiculed... But most women didnt do that to me...when i would muster my courage and look them in the eyes they'd hold me in, make me open up... let it out! and i'd warm up to them and be 'the real me, behind the mask'... the guy i keep hidden from the rest of the world.... I owe it to them big time... i can never forget them, cos they saw me when i was invisible... not many people in this world are capable of doing that...
see you know... girls are a little weird tho for me. Sometimes I think they can be just as cold and calculating as the men, after all, even their boyfriends can be as cold and calculating and 'super macho', and well they may think that guys have to be "super macho" otherwise they don't deserve to live thought "natural selection", and they are the sort of "gate keepers" in the "book of life" in that sense. They can play the nice girl all they want but on the inside it could be totally different and they might just be tip toeing around my softness. Because hell, it just sucks the whole stereotypes people have of gender roles. "Girls are weak and guys are strong". So ANY sort of perceived "weakness" can tend to be group together with "feminine" so that means any guy who shows any sort of weakness, they are thought to be feminine, or "less of a man/human freakin being". You know that whole stereotype of the "alpha male/beta male" extremities... And how women can't supposedly tell the difference between inner strength and "external showy" strength, but also guys can be really deceptive. What if you wear external "weakness" as a mask?
Don't take my kindness for weakness.
And I mean really these stereotypes are also not all woman's fault. What about male's role in this? Are us guys supposed to be by nature brutal? Is this the message we want to communicate to each other? That we are unrefined, brutal, impoverished cavemen? Are women then supposed to be purely attracted to brutality?
Sigh, I dunno. sometimes I feel I am judged by women because of this. It might help though to let them know that guys are human beings, and they should not be expected to be perfect, but they can be simple and genuine.
though, I get along more with I guess you can say women that aren't so freakin uptight with me, but I share compassion with all of them.
it's been easy for me to fall victim to the above stereotypes. Especially because I have been lacking in enough or "close" relationships with females, and even males, such that I guess I don't really know how people really are on the inside. My mind just gives up to the stereotypical images, and generalizations, especially when you don't see much different, or all that you have seen from others is their sheaths, and not their inner selves.
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