Do you think you're ugly?
- Thread starter Argamemnon
- Start date
meatcake
1
Regarding confidence and looks, I remember an episode of Red Dwarf - there's this character who is really nebbish, negative, snobby, sarcastic, no one likes him, and he looks kind of awful. And even his name is horrible - Rimmer! But then he ran into his alter-ego from an alternate universe, who was confident, outgoing, had way better hair (a wig actually), and looked really good. His name was Ace, I think. The thing was, they were both played by the same actor!
But yeah, the hard part is actually feeling confident. I was really impressed by how well that actor could pull off both parts though.
But yeah, the hard part is actually feeling confident. I was really impressed by how well that actor could pull off both parts though.
NormanBates
Well-known member
LOL i hear you. I inherited some skinny genes. That's all I can blame it on. I've even had girls compliment me on my size saying they're envious.
Perfidion
Well-known member
Arnold Judas Rimmer, played by Chris Barrie. Great actor, great show... shame it's not on anymore.
Funniest Red Dwarf moment ever:
YouTube - Rimmer song Red Dwarf
Perfidion
Well-known member
I actually hate how people look in commercials and advertisements. The girls always look odd to me. They have a completely symmetrical appearance. They don't look like they have any errors with their body. This probably sounds weird, but I just don't like that look. Hmmm... this probably makes no sense and everyone is going to think I'm weird now.
Agreed. Women who are considered conventionally attractive don't usually do a whole lot for me. It's like there's some giant production line somewhere relentlessly churning out blonde-haired, blue-eyed, big-breasted clones, and the whole scenario is just so depressing.
Comic artist, Daniel Clowes, put it best in his satirical strip, 'Ugly Girls'...
"All I know is when I see a 'beautiful' woman, I'm usually bowled over by a kind of existential boredom. Girls who buy into that whole glamour thing always look as though they're trying too hard -- like they're embarrassed to be human. The more makeup a girl has on, the more I wonder if she's actually a guy in drag."
And models these days look like they've just crawled under the barbed wire to escape a Nazi death camp. They're not slim. They're emaciated. It's pretty revolting to be honest.
recluse
Well-known member
Fake breasted, orange tanned women don't do it for me....I'd rather have 100% real. What people don't realise is that these women in magazines are airbrushed so if you saw them in real life they wouldn't look like they do in the magazines.
I'm just so sick that women seem to think that they have to look like orange tanned bimbo's. And those skinny models eww!
I'm just so sick that women seem to think that they have to look like orange tanned bimbo's. And those skinny models eww!
Pookah
Well-known member
I do think I am ugly I have thought so all my life. I am somewhat awkward as well. Its my height (6ft) and chubbiness methinx.
You get to a point where you hope people can sense your inner self and overlook it. Like you are pushing out all your inner energy trying to connect with others. But people only see the outside and don't sense your feelings or thoughts.
You get to a point where you hope people can sense your inner self and overlook it. Like you are pushing out all your inner energy trying to connect with others. But people only see the outside and don't sense your feelings or thoughts.
Argamemnon
Well-known member
I have thought about this a lot lately, and I have to correct myself. Ugliness is not the main issue (I might not even be ugly, I don't know). My problem is I'm afraid to look anxious. I always feel terribly anxious around people, and simply don't want them to see my anxious face. This is just as worse as feeling ugly. Feeling anxious is part of who I am, it doesn't seem like it's something I can change.
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Moonchild
Active member
Someone once told me that beauty has nothing to do with the physical appearence
and that it has to do with some kind of inner shinning. I guess we all are beautifull
as long as we get to accept ourselves and let our souls shine. But as I've always been
an avoidant, I can understand how it feels to feel ugly and that everybody else is
thinking of that. But trust me, they don't. Nobody really cares how we look like but ourselves.
But I think I now have to answer the question...
I don't think I'm ugly but I believe I have nothing beautifull to say. Ever.
I believe my mind is worthless.
I guess just because I don't care about physicall appearence as I do care about one's inner beauty, my low self esteem hits me there
and that it has to do with some kind of inner shinning. I guess we all are beautifull
as long as we get to accept ourselves and let our souls shine. But as I've always been
an avoidant, I can understand how it feels to feel ugly and that everybody else is
thinking of that. But trust me, they don't. Nobody really cares how we look like but ourselves.
But I think I now have to answer the question...
I don't think I'm ugly but I believe I have nothing beautifull to say. Ever.
I believe my mind is worthless.
I guess just because I don't care about physicall appearence as I do care about one's inner beauty, my low self esteem hits me there
NormanBates
Well-known member
When I feel like that, I just think to myself : "I've seen my other faces and therefore know better than these other people."
princess_haru
Well-known member
Hmm, that's interesting - thanks for posting that. Axe is called Lynx in the UK so I wasn't sure what the product was at first, but yeah I've seen the stupid Lynx/Axe ads with the besotted half-naked women following the deodorant-wearing men about in some sort of strange sexual trance...
I've never thought Dove were particularly admirable for their awareness campaign, as it's obviously just another advertising ploy; their aim isn't to make women feel better, but to endear themselves to women who are sick of seeing unrealistic images of beauty in the media (that'd be most of us, then!) and sell more of their product by doing so. Still, I do think the videos they've made are valuable as they raise awareness of the degree to which our eyes and minds are fooled by false imagery in advertising.
When I was younger, I didn't have a clue that the photos I saw were altered so dramatically so I used to look at the pretty pictures in magazines and feel shit about my appearance, wondering why my skin wasn't flawless, my hair gleaming, my teeth perfect... it's especially destructive for people with SA, I believe. I didn't get out a lot in my teens due to my shyness, so most of the other human beings I saw were on TV, in films and in magazines. Most (if not all) of those people were picked for their physical appearance, then given the benefits of professional stylists, trainers, makeup artists and hairdressers, and - if their image was to be used in a magazine - also put through a computer to filter out any remaining human flaws in order to leave an immaculate doll. When I started to venture out of the house again, it was practically a revelation to see genuine people, with their uneven teeth, big noses, wobbly bellies and nobbly knees!
Argamemnon
Well-known member
After feeling great for 4-5 days in a row, I'm horribly depressed again and I'm sleep deprived. I feel extremely ugly when I look in the mirror. It's very clear that me feeling ugly has to do with severe depression. In the end it doesn't matter though, I'm ugly period.
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princess_haru
Well-known member
Agreed on the eww to fake-tanned, plasticky bimbos, but it's not fair to be down on all skinny women. There's a huge trend for extreme thinness at the moment and it's causing a lot of damage to women's (and men's, in some cases) self esteem and health - but there are plenty of women who are naturally skinny and sick of people commenting on it. Not many people would tell an overweight stranger that they need to eat less, but it seems plenty of people are happy to tell a skinny person they've just met that they should eat more, or to ask them whether they have an eating disorder! :
:A century ago, it was fashionable for a woman to have ample curves (and it still is in many cultures!), and thinness was generally considered sickly and unattractive; a sign of poverty and ill health. Nowadays, people see it as the polar opposite - most aspire to be like the privileged, slim celebrities they admire. No matter what arbitrary body shape is fashionable at the moment, I think we need to work with what we've naturally got and focus on being healthy and happy instead of being fashionable and uncomfortable
princess_haru
Well-known member
Some doctors are a nightmare - my brother had a bowel problem and had to see several doctors before he found one to help. He ended up having to have a serious operation, but the first few docs he saw didn't take him seriously at all!
Do you get out (even in your garden, if you have one) in the daytime every day? If I don't get enough daylight I always find it harder to sleep. I know it's a hideous old cliche, but fresh air and exercise really do help tons! It's hard to find the motivation when you're feeling down and tired, but if you know you're not doing enough exercise then that's probably the first thing to look at. Worrying stops me sleeping sometimes, and I read somewhere that the best thing for dealing with that is to write a list of everything that's on your mind before you go to bed. I feel like I've done something productive with my worries when I do that, and it means I only lie there worrying for about 10 minutes instead of an hour or more
Waking up early in the morning is one of the signs of severe/chronic depression, so I think you need to find a better doctor who'll help you out. Hope things get better for you soon *hugs*
whatsallthisthen
Member
I personally think that the only problem with the way I look is my acne problem. Perhaps I am also a little on the skinny side. But guys and girls alike have often told me that I'm quite good looking, so I know that the occasional ugliness I feel is mostly a spiritual one rather than a physical one.