How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
Tryin
Well-known member
love_me said:Sorry, I forgot to tell u.
Today was good for me. I've been still feeling happy.
It's so interestin to feel happy, cus I didn feel happy for a
long long time. And today I registered here. So Im happier now.
God, my day is really good today.
Wish you lots of days like this. And welcome!
Starry
Well-known member
*****RANT WARNING*****
Miserable, angry, fed-up, ugly, no hideous is a better word. *Sigh*
I'm just feeling really down, and it's making me feel angry, I want to snap at everyone. I just posted a new picture of myself on another forum. (I don't know why... It was hideous, I hate posting my picture, and the mood I'm in I can't stand criticism or praise... I'm just weird.) Someone said "I wish you wouldn't apologise when you post a pic. You look LOVELY!"
So I'm trying to refrain from posting a snappy, sarcastic comment back because the person doesn't deserve that, and nothing was said to actually warrant that, but I really want to post a comment like "Yeah, and I suppose some people consider mould 'lovely'. Don't lie to me - I HATE liars!" (Yeah, I'm just sooo great with sarcasm. :roll
Grrrrr! I don't even know why I'm posting this...
I just want to rant, please feel free to ignore me. Infact, it's probably for the best if you do ignore me.
Plus I have a bad headache which I woke up with. *Sigh* I want to restart today... But it's a bit late at 17:00.
Now I'm going to get this gunk called Make-up off my face, stupid horrible, pore-clogging stuff. I only put it on to take the pictures lol. I shouldn't have bothered. :lol: :roll:
Sorry, end of rant.
Sorry.
Miserable, angry, fed-up, ugly, no hideous is a better word. *Sigh*
I'm just feeling really down, and it's making me feel angry, I want to snap at everyone. I just posted a new picture of myself on another forum. (I don't know why... It was hideous, I hate posting my picture, and the mood I'm in I can't stand criticism or praise... I'm just weird.) Someone said "I wish you wouldn't apologise when you post a pic. You look LOVELY!"
So I'm trying to refrain from posting a snappy, sarcastic comment back because the person doesn't deserve that, and nothing was said to actually warrant that, but I really want to post a comment like "Yeah, and I suppose some people consider mould 'lovely'. Don't lie to me - I HATE liars!" (Yeah, I'm just sooo great with sarcasm. :roll
Grrrrr! I don't even know why I'm posting this...
I just want to rant, please feel free to ignore me. Infact, it's probably for the best if you do ignore me.
Plus I have a bad headache which I woke up with. *Sigh* I want to restart today... But it's a bit late at 17:00.
Now I'm going to get this gunk called Make-up off my face, stupid horrible, pore-clogging stuff. I only put it on to take the pictures lol. I shouldn't have bothered. :lol: :roll:
Sorry, end of rant.
Sorry.
Amiyumi
Well-known member
Starry, feel free to chew me out for this...
I really won't mind, (I'm just saying cause I was really down few days ago, but I can deal with it now, and on something like this, I won't mind)
I saw your pic in the photo section, and you look ok. I feel really patronized with complements, so I'm not just trying to make you feel better. I hate that too.
You have nice eyes, and I like the shape of your face, you have nice lips and teeth, (and that smile looks natural, mine are forced). I don't know... maybe you could try and experement with your looks, thats what I did. A hairstyle could help, hairstyles can completley change me...
Just because I thought I could relate to how you feel, ah, I thought I could help... but I can't.
On another post, I think, um, scottish_player put up a link to a site called hot or not. (Sorry, I'll have to go find it again, the threads called what do you think I look like.. i think)
It's a rating site, but I wanna put mine up there, for an honest rating first, before I post myself here. If that'll help.
But try not to get mad wif people who do that, they're intentions were good. I'll always give a honest opinion on that kind of thing.. but I'll be constructive, what would it be otherwise? What kind of reactions did you want? I don't wanna put mine up here cause I can't take complements good or bad... If I posted my pic, I'd be a bit anoyed at lovley too... it feels fake, and praise and complements freak me out a bit...
(In otherwords, if I post my pic, just say I look normal, that'd make my day :lol: ).
I really won't mind, (I'm just saying cause I was really down few days ago, but I can deal with it now, and on something like this, I won't mind)
I saw your pic in the photo section, and you look ok. I feel really patronized with complements, so I'm not just trying to make you feel better. I hate that too.
You have nice eyes, and I like the shape of your face, you have nice lips and teeth, (and that smile looks natural, mine are forced). I don't know... maybe you could try and experement with your looks, thats what I did. A hairstyle could help, hairstyles can completley change me...
Just because I thought I could relate to how you feel, ah, I thought I could help... but I can't.
On another post, I think, um, scottish_player put up a link to a site called hot or not. (Sorry, I'll have to go find it again, the threads called what do you think I look like.. i think)
It's a rating site, but I wanna put mine up there, for an honest rating first, before I post myself here. If that'll help.
But try not to get mad wif people who do that, they're intentions were good. I'll always give a honest opinion on that kind of thing.. but I'll be constructive, what would it be otherwise? What kind of reactions did you want? I don't wanna put mine up here cause I can't take complements good or bad... If I posted my pic, I'd be a bit anoyed at lovley too... it feels fake, and praise and complements freak me out a bit...
(In otherwords, if I post my pic, just say I look normal, that'd make my day :lol: ).
Amiyumi
Well-known member
I just remembered I was gonna rant too, I'm sorry, it just really got to me this time...
I was mad at my mums friend. She was talking, and cause she started talking about sex, and nothing serious not in the slightest, she asked me to leave the room because I'm to "fragile and inexperienced in life" and she didn't wanna freak me out. Not my little sis, not the 15 year old neighbour, but 24 year old me. Cause I've never had a man..
'sigh' ..and I went. I hate it when she'll apologize for swearing in front of me too.. that's degrading. Everyone I know swears, I'm used to it. Just because I don't go out, have friends or never had sex that means I'm some kid? What makes it worse is the fact that my family, they don't say anything, like "she is 24 y'know..."
Grrr...
I'm mad, but it's not in my nature to shout or get angry. I just hate myself for not saying anything about it. I'm just too embarrassed, but you can understand why I'm annoyed right?
No one else does it... what the heck is her problem?!
I was mad at my mums friend. She was talking, and cause she started talking about sex, and nothing serious not in the slightest, she asked me to leave the room because I'm to "fragile and inexperienced in life" and she didn't wanna freak me out. Not my little sis, not the 15 year old neighbour, but 24 year old me. Cause I've never had a man..
'sigh' ..and I went. I hate it when she'll apologize for swearing in front of me too.. that's degrading. Everyone I know swears, I'm used to it. Just because I don't go out, have friends or never had sex that means I'm some kid? What makes it worse is the fact that my family, they don't say anything, like "she is 24 y'know..."
Grrr...
I'm mad, but it's not in my nature to shout or get angry. I just hate myself for not saying anything about it. I'm just too embarrassed, but you can understand why I'm annoyed right?
No one else does it... what the heck is her problem?!
Amiyumi
Well-known member
Thanks Masamune, my family just get to me sometimes, they treat me so diffrently. Latley they've been supporting me alot, I can't take praise well, it feels fake, and thats not what I want, I want to be treated the way they treat everyone else. I'm just social phobic and agoraphobic (I'm ignoring the as diagnosis) It's just isolation, I'm bad at communicating cause of it, but so would anyone else. And treating me like that's not exactly solving the problem. I hate that attitude when I play video games too, but what should I care? Some of the things they do aren't exactly mature themselves.
I can't wait to get on with my life, I crave my own place and a life, I'll get it eventually, I have to, I'm not getting any younger.
Sorry if I don't make much sense here...
What happened was cause of my mums friend, shes 30, my older sisters age, she kinda knows how I feel with being housebound cause she has really bad depression and sometimes stays in and can't face the world. She was abused as a kid, but she dosen't fear men like I do. But thats how I come out to talk to her when she comes up, cause I can relate. But she dosen't know why I'm in the house, that I went through similar things, and I think she was offended that I gave her some advice on relationships. Ever since that shes gotten a bit worse with treating me like that, worse than the usual.
I haven't told my parents anything when it came to guys either at school and college. I didn't really bond with them, so I can't, even now, I can imagine them getting mad, I know they would.
Anyway, I said to her about the man she was with from what she said, and baisically what was gonna happen. That he was using her, he was abusive and was after her daughter. That was terrible to say, and I can see why I shouldn't have.. but everything did happen. And it's not like I rubbed her face in it with I told you so, I don't do that. It was a really stupid thing to do, I know that now. I'll stay quiet next time, I don't have the people skills or experience to help. I was just trying to help.
I'm so sick of not being to tell anyone anything, no one knowing and being stuck here. They think I'm just really shy, ugh, they should have figured it out by now. And I do have someone I love, but we are kind of friends just now, he wants me to get on with my life a bit first. I'm so grateful I met him, he knows everything, and won't tell. My family just think I'm gonna be on my own the rest of my life... I just hate keeping everything in. And her wondering what gives me the right to think I can give any advice to anyone cause I've spent my life in here. I'm not the stupid little girl she thinks I am, but I do deserve a telling off for saying that though.
p.s. Starry, that post I made about your rant, I'm sorry for that too. I thought I could relate to how you felt about that, and I couldn't. You are nice though, seriously. My problem with my looks is that I fear positive judgement and I'm hurt by negative judgement.
And I really messed up giving advice in the depression forum... ahh...
But I'm gonna keep my posts there, I need to accept the fact that I make mistakes, but I won't be trying to help in things now where I obviously cant.
Right now I'm feeling happy with myself. I felt left out, from them after that day, and stayed up looking up make up and all that stuff. I felt so ugly and disgusted with myself looking at all that stuff that girls have, I feel like I've missed out on so much, I didn't feel like a woman, just a kid, a tomboy. I was so choked up and gonna cry and just then my online gardian angel caught me online =) and made me feel normal, myself again. I'm back to loving myself again and the guy who likes me, likes me for what I am. 'sigh' I just feel so strong now.
And thanks, for listening to my rant. I'll try an be a little more positive next time.^.^
I can't wait to get on with my life, I crave my own place and a life, I'll get it eventually, I have to, I'm not getting any younger.
Sorry if I don't make much sense here...
What happened was cause of my mums friend, shes 30, my older sisters age, she kinda knows how I feel with being housebound cause she has really bad depression and sometimes stays in and can't face the world. She was abused as a kid, but she dosen't fear men like I do. But thats how I come out to talk to her when she comes up, cause I can relate. But she dosen't know why I'm in the house, that I went through similar things, and I think she was offended that I gave her some advice on relationships. Ever since that shes gotten a bit worse with treating me like that, worse than the usual.
I haven't told my parents anything when it came to guys either at school and college. I didn't really bond with them, so I can't, even now, I can imagine them getting mad, I know they would.
Anyway, I said to her about the man she was with from what she said, and baisically what was gonna happen. That he was using her, he was abusive and was after her daughter. That was terrible to say, and I can see why I shouldn't have.. but everything did happen. And it's not like I rubbed her face in it with I told you so, I don't do that. It was a really stupid thing to do, I know that now. I'll stay quiet next time, I don't have the people skills or experience to help. I was just trying to help.
I'm so sick of not being to tell anyone anything, no one knowing and being stuck here. They think I'm just really shy, ugh, they should have figured it out by now. And I do have someone I love, but we are kind of friends just now, he wants me to get on with my life a bit first. I'm so grateful I met him, he knows everything, and won't tell. My family just think I'm gonna be on my own the rest of my life... I just hate keeping everything in. And her wondering what gives me the right to think I can give any advice to anyone cause I've spent my life in here. I'm not the stupid little girl she thinks I am, but I do deserve a telling off for saying that though.
p.s. Starry, that post I made about your rant, I'm sorry for that too. I thought I could relate to how you felt about that, and I couldn't. You are nice though, seriously. My problem with my looks is that I fear positive judgement and I'm hurt by negative judgement.
And I really messed up giving advice in the depression forum... ahh...
But I'm gonna keep my posts there, I need to accept the fact that I make mistakes, but I won't be trying to help in things now where I obviously cant.
Right now I'm feeling happy with myself. I felt left out, from them after that day, and stayed up looking up make up and all that stuff. I felt so ugly and disgusted with myself looking at all that stuff that girls have, I feel like I've missed out on so much, I didn't feel like a woman, just a kid, a tomboy. I was so choked up and gonna cry and just then my online gardian angel caught me online =) and made me feel normal, myself again. I'm back to loving myself again and the guy who likes me, likes me for what I am. 'sigh' I just feel so strong now.
And thanks, for listening to my rant. I'll try an be a little more positive next time.^.^
Tryin
Well-known member
I (as I read the above posts) feel like life is way more complicated then I thought. I feel helpless and angry, and sad. And stupid. I feel like everyone is completely alone with his problems, really. I feel like I cannot reach out to other people, nor advise them or make them feel better. I feel like wishing people luck is all I can do for them. And I feel that's not enough.
So, I wish you luck coping with your life.
(Ranting again. Aww..)
So, I wish you luck coping with your life.
(Ranting again. Aww..)
Amiyumi
Well-known member
Hee hee, I'm feelin great!
I'm plannin on going out on tes, and take some pics of the city. I'm so up for it, I'm just gonna have a day to myself out there. It's a bit weird planning in advance, but I'll be high till then getting ready for it, knowing theres something to look foward to!
Last night, I did feel pretty bad, but I spend way too much time worrying that I'm gonna upset everyone. And I feel sorry for myself too much, so I whine. Thanks for putting up with that, this is the only place I have to come and let things out, talk to people (from the outside :lol: ) but I felt guilty for always whining and using here as some kind of emotional dumping ground. I just feel like I'm reaching the end of this dark tunnel ive been passing through this month.
I'm plannin on going out on tes, and take some pics of the city. I'm so up for it, I'm just gonna have a day to myself out there. It's a bit weird planning in advance, but I'll be high till then getting ready for it, knowing theres something to look foward to!
Last night, I did feel pretty bad, but I spend way too much time worrying that I'm gonna upset everyone. And I feel sorry for myself too much, so I whine. Thanks for putting up with that, this is the only place I have to come and let things out, talk to people (from the outside :lol: ) but I felt guilty for always whining and using here as some kind of emotional dumping ground. I just feel like I'm reaching the end of this dark tunnel ive been passing through this month.
scatmantom
Well-known member
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