Sometimes I can be, sometimes not so very much!! hm
^ Thank you! I hope that's also the case with me.I get like that after I've done something that's outside my comfort zone. There's often an intial period of increased anxiety, but then that subsides and I feel good that I challenged myself, and came through it. I'm sure that will be the case for you too.
Well done for being brave enough to do something that scared you!
It's a pity more people in the world don't feel the way you do.
/ and Rem and alot of people here!
... ::
: Sorry for the rant. I'm just so sick of feeling like this, and angry at myself for not even being able to socialize properly... I really should start a journal or something so I don't have to keep posting here.
empty and lonely.:
*hugs*
*fills her up* (that may sound more naughty than intended)
Thanks for the laugh Lemur.::
Awful.
Just got back from a friend's grad party. There were a ton of people there so I felt extremely uncomfortable the whole time. I did meet a few new people that were really nice, they even got me to play a game with them. I talked to them a little, but near the end of the party I couldn't even say goodbye to them or even a little "Nice meeting you" because I was so nervous. Instead I just stood there and watched them leave. I felt so rude and ignorant, I still do.
A few times I felt like I was going to burst into tears, and at one point I had to go into one of the campers they had just to pull myself together. It didn't help that my friend just put all the attention on me a few times by saying, "Stop looking so bored." (My nervousness never shows. I always look aloof and/or bored when really on the inside I'm freaking out.) I did happen to work up the courage and come up to another friend's mom and say Hi, but I just got made fun of for being quiet and nervous too. So because of that, I just kept my mouth shut even more. I was pretty much quiet up to when I had to leave. I hardly said goodbye to anyone, I just left with my brother, who had more fun at that party than I did, and he knew less people.
Now that today's over, I'm just going to shut myself inside for the rest of the week. :
:
^ Hehe, no need for punching. Sure it makes me feel bad, but like you said, screw it. I shouldn't even worry about it because it's not like I'll be talking to them again, or possibly not anytime soon. I'm off to college in one month, and I'm starting to get into the mindset of not even caring about most of the people from the past (except for family and friends of course). I'm just ready to move on.I like many can totally relate... don't feel down - it's just many things going on, your brain cannot function into a relaxed social mode - groups can be the worst. You were made fun of for being quiet? That's out of line by them - screw 'em. I'd love to have punched their mouths with my tiny lemur fists of fury :
Don't feel so bad on yourself - write a journal, it helps, and don't shut yourself in all week. A few days - and do something, even small, just so you don't get into a recycle of avoidance. Hard as they are, these "bad" experiences are worthwhile tho not seem so now - but - anyways, feel better. You had a busy week. You deserve some time "off"
^ Hehe, no need for punching. Sure it makes me feel bad, but like you said, screw it. I shouldn't even worry about it because it's not like I'll be talking to them again, or possibly not anytime soon. I'm off to college in one month, and I'm starting to get into the mindset of not even caring about most of the people from the past (except for family and friends of course). I'm just ready to move on.
And I do have a journal on my computer, but sometimes it still doesn't help. Sometimes I feel that even just venting on my own isn't enough, that I need some sort of feedback. Anyway, thanks for the kind words Lemur. Seriously, I don't know how you stay so positive and always full of helpful advice. What's your secret?
^ Thanks Lemur! Glad to hear your coming back to good positive ways.
I will definitely take up the journal thing, but not tonight. I need to rest.
